Is there anything better than a woman who loves You, mind, body and soul, just the way You are and doesn't try to change You or force You into a mold You are not comfortable with?
I love her.
Monday, January 5, 2015
Friday, October 31, 2014
New romantics
I want to become gay Taylor Swift when I grow up. I'd be super rich and I'd have an outlet to express my feelings and confusion.
We're all bored
We're oh so tired of everything
We wait for trains that just aren't coming
We show off our different scarlet letters
Trust me mine is better
We're so young that we're on the road to ruin
We play dumb
But we know exactly what we're doing
We cry tears
Of mascara in the bathroom
Honey life is just a classroom
Cause baby I could build a castle
Out of all the bricks they threw at me
And every day it's like battle
But every night feels just like a dream
Baby we're the new romantics
Come on, come along with me
Heart break is the national anthem
We sing it proudly
We're too busy dancing
To get knocked off our feet
Baby we're the new romantics
The best people in life are free
We're all bored
We're oh so tired of everything
We wait for trains that just aren't coming
We show off our different scarlet letters
Trust me mine is better
We're so young that we're on the road to ruin
We play dumb
But we know exactly what we're doing
We cry tears
Of mascara in the bathroom
Honey life is just a classroom
Cause baby I could build a castle
Out of all the bricks they threw at me
And every day it's like battle
But every night feels just like a dream
Baby we're the new romantics
Come on, come along with me
Heart break is the national anthem
We sing it proudly
We're too busy dancing
To get knocked off our feet
Baby we're the new romantics
The best people in life are free
Sunday, October 26, 2014
Forssa Pride is done for now
So, a week ago we celebrated the 5th Forssa Pride at Bar54. It was the last Forssa Pride I organized, at least for now, since I hope to be anywhere but here by next spring. The First Forssa Pride gathered about 180 party goers, the two after that about 100 a piece and the 4th about 70. So the trend has, unfortunately, been down since we started. Last week there was only 47. I'm super thankful for each and every one of the people who have showed up, but I can't be happy about the 47 people. I'm kind of sad and I feel like a fraud with my "creator and organizer of Forssa Pride" intro on twitter. I know Forssa is a small town and I know not everyone is out, wants to party, likes the location or has the free time, but I had hoped for a bigger crowd. And unfortunately a lot of my friends I had counted on didn't show. But that's life and you just gotta deal.
The good news is that I spoke with one of the owners today and we left things open for more Forssa Prides in the future. And we kind of have a program for it if it materializes. So stay tuned.
In the mean time, the closest LGBTI-parties to Forssa are in Turku, Tampere, Helsinki and Lahti. I'll see you in some of them!
The good news is that I spoke with one of the owners today and we left things open for more Forssa Prides in the future. And we kind of have a program for it if it materializes. So stay tuned.
In the mean time, the closest LGBTI-parties to Forssa are in Turku, Tampere, Helsinki and Lahti. I'll see you in some of them!
Friday, October 24, 2014
Coming full circle
I feel like I may have used that title before, but who cares? I'm in the environmental field and recycling is good for the environment!
If you have been reading my blog since the beginning, or even just for a few years, you know I take my lesbian TV characters seriously, especially Calzona and Brittana. Four years ago, almost to the date, Calzona broke up on Grey's Anatomy. I was devastated as I had just gone through a break up and got attached and involved. It became important to me for them to get back together and I felt that if they would be ok, so would I.
Eventually they got back together and I felt cheated. And I've written about this before. Nothing felt like before. Calzona might have been ok, even if I didn't feel like they were, but I certainly wasn't. Well, I just watched the latest episode of Grey's and lo and behold, Calzona broke up again. Almost four years after the first time. Or the most serious time. My reaction? WTF? Didn't see that coming. But other than that? Fine. I've gained life experience, I've gained wisdom and most importantly, I know that what I see on TV does not necessarily reflect the reality, or my reality at least. And I don't need to escape into the world of TV lesbians anymore.
So why am I writing this reflective piece if I don't care anymore? Because it's my damn blog and I can if I want to!
If you have been reading my blog since the beginning, or even just for a few years, you know I take my lesbian TV characters seriously, especially Calzona and Brittana. Four years ago, almost to the date, Calzona broke up on Grey's Anatomy. I was devastated as I had just gone through a break up and got attached and involved. It became important to me for them to get back together and I felt that if they would be ok, so would I.
Eventually they got back together and I felt cheated. And I've written about this before. Nothing felt like before. Calzona might have been ok, even if I didn't feel like they were, but I certainly wasn't. Well, I just watched the latest episode of Grey's and lo and behold, Calzona broke up again. Almost four years after the first time. Or the most serious time. My reaction? WTF? Didn't see that coming. But other than that? Fine. I've gained life experience, I've gained wisdom and most importantly, I know that what I see on TV does not necessarily reflect the reality, or my reality at least. And I don't need to escape into the world of TV lesbians anymore.
So why am I writing this reflective piece if I don't care anymore? Because it's my damn blog and I can if I want to!
Saturday, August 23, 2014
Speechless…or not.
If there's one thing I love it's the critique from people who do absolutely nothing but sit on their asses and criticize other people or organizations just trying to do a good job. So instead of going off on this person who left a comment on Qruiser sharing Gay Cafe's fall schedule, I'm just going to open up about it here instead.
Her comments paraphrased: 1) Forssa treats it's gays like garbage, tells them that over and over again and that's why Mental health organization is hosting/needs to host Gay Cafe.
2) The typographical setting of the (schedule and info) poster might keep the people away.
First of all, Forssa as a city might not be doing much for its gay citizens but it doesn't differ any from how Finland currently is treating its citizens, and really, which city organizes anything for it's gays? No one, that's who. It's the Seta's of this world, not the cities. Do I wish Forssa and its people were more involved? Absolutely! Do I expect this to change? No.
Secondly, there are homophobes and idiots everywhere. The situation here could be worse, but could also be better. I'm working every day to make it better here, and people like her are not helping. Instead of just criticizing and spreading negativity, how about suggestions for how to improve? I have been able to live openly for many years now without having any negative experiences and so are many others. Teenage years could have been better, but I was in the closet and deep in denial. People around me used homophobic language, I used homophobic language, and that sucks, but I believe me being openly and proudly me, has since then made a difference.
When it comes to Gay Cafe being held at a Mental Health Organization…It's a PRE-VEN-TA-TIVE organization. And where Gay Cafe is held should't matter. What matters that it's here. And from the sound of it, it could have helped her, had we've been here while she was still in Forssa. But anyway…alluding that Gay Cafe should be with a mental health organization because we are crazy makes it sound like LGBTI-people are crazy and now she is just buying into the homophobes' jargon.
Now when it comes to the poster…I am open for her to come and work her magic as a graphic designer and make a poster for us that will bring "all the gays to the yard" and not be so unpleasing to the eye.
The sad reality is that there are very very few LGBTI-advocates and organizers actively doing this right now. Being in a leadership position at a local Seta might mean that it all falls on few people while others just like to party. As we have no Seta in Forssa, it all falls on me. Leading Gay Cafe and organizing Forssa Pride takes dedication and commitment and I have yet to meet people from Forssa who are willing to put in the work to make this a community and to make sure this continues after I'm no longer in Forssa. This fall might be the last few months when any LGBTI-related events happen here and instead of negativity I hope to see some enthusiasm and positivity. Come at me with your suggestions how to do this better. I'm all ears. The floor is yours.
Her comments paraphrased: 1) Forssa treats it's gays like garbage, tells them that over and over again and that's why Mental health organization is hosting/needs to host Gay Cafe.
2) The typographical setting of the (schedule and info) poster might keep the people away.
First of all, Forssa as a city might not be doing much for its gay citizens but it doesn't differ any from how Finland currently is treating its citizens, and really, which city organizes anything for it's gays? No one, that's who. It's the Seta's of this world, not the cities. Do I wish Forssa and its people were more involved? Absolutely! Do I expect this to change? No.
Secondly, there are homophobes and idiots everywhere. The situation here could be worse, but could also be better. I'm working every day to make it better here, and people like her are not helping. Instead of just criticizing and spreading negativity, how about suggestions for how to improve? I have been able to live openly for many years now without having any negative experiences and so are many others. Teenage years could have been better, but I was in the closet and deep in denial. People around me used homophobic language, I used homophobic language, and that sucks, but I believe me being openly and proudly me, has since then made a difference.
When it comes to Gay Cafe being held at a Mental Health Organization…It's a PRE-VEN-TA-TIVE organization. And where Gay Cafe is held should't matter. What matters that it's here. And from the sound of it, it could have helped her, had we've been here while she was still in Forssa. But anyway…alluding that Gay Cafe should be with a mental health organization because we are crazy makes it sound like LGBTI-people are crazy and now she is just buying into the homophobes' jargon.
Now when it comes to the poster…I am open for her to come and work her magic as a graphic designer and make a poster for us that will bring "all the gays to the yard" and not be so unpleasing to the eye.
The sad reality is that there are very very few LGBTI-advocates and organizers actively doing this right now. Being in a leadership position at a local Seta might mean that it all falls on few people while others just like to party. As we have no Seta in Forssa, it all falls on me. Leading Gay Cafe and organizing Forssa Pride takes dedication and commitment and I have yet to meet people from Forssa who are willing to put in the work to make this a community and to make sure this continues after I'm no longer in Forssa. This fall might be the last few months when any LGBTI-related events happen here and instead of negativity I hope to see some enthusiasm and positivity. Come at me with your suggestions how to do this better. I'm all ears. The floor is yours.
Tuesday, July 29, 2014
Jeppis Pride, oh Jeppis Pride
I know I've said that I will post things from Lahti Pride, and never did, and from Helsinki Pride, and never did, but now I'm wondering is it really relevant anymore? It's been so long…
And there was a new and exciting Pride in Pietarsaari this past weekend, Jeppis Pride, which was just fantastisk! so I'm gonna write about that instead.
I went there with Mikko as his arm candy/helper/map reader. He was there working for Sinuiksi.fi (advice and support service for LGBTI-people, check it out) and had room in his car and I was on a vacation so it worked out perfectly. On top of that, we got to hang out with some of the people from SETA's board, who I don't get to see often, so that was nice. AND, on top of that, they are now being utilized in my quest to find my better half, as are some of the employees, so that's great. Now that led to some hilarious and embarrassing situations, but that's neither here nor there! We clearly didn't think the whole thing trough, as we had to leave on Saturday night to drive home the 4h drive it took to get to Mikko's place. The party on Saturday could have yielded some stories, phone numbers or smoke signals later on, but alas, I was tired. We kept around midnight and got to his place around 3:30am.
We started Thursday with an LGBTIQ-presentation/discussion at summer camp after which we went to Mikko's place, left my car there and hit the road. We left around 8pm and I live tweeted our road trip with the hashtag RoadTripToJeppisPride, which you can find from Instagram and Twitter.
And there was a new and exciting Pride in Pietarsaari this past weekend, Jeppis Pride, which was just fantastisk! so I'm gonna write about that instead.
I went there with Mikko as his arm candy/helper/map reader. He was there working for Sinuiksi.fi (advice and support service for LGBTI-people, check it out) and had room in his car and I was on a vacation so it worked out perfectly. On top of that, we got to hang out with some of the people from SETA's board, who I don't get to see often, so that was nice. AND, on top of that, they are now being utilized in my quest to find my better half, as are some of the employees, so that's great. Now that led to some hilarious and embarrassing situations, but that's neither here nor there! We clearly didn't think the whole thing trough, as we had to leave on Saturday night to drive home the 4h drive it took to get to Mikko's place. The party on Saturday could have yielded some stories, phone numbers or smoke signals later on, but alas, I was tired. We kept around midnight and got to his place around 3:30am.
We started Thursday with an LGBTIQ-presentation/discussion at summer camp after which we went to Mikko's place, left my car there and hit the road. We left around 8pm and I live tweeted our road trip with the hashtag RoadTripToJeppisPride, which you can find from Instagram and Twitter.
Me and Mikko at Prometheus Camp. I went to visit my dads grave beforehand and let me tell you, it felt weird being there in all of my rainbow glory.
The "Sinuiksi/SETA" mobile.
On our way.
Blinding sun.
Route 66 was long! About halfway there.
Rainbow lights welcomed us to our hotel.
Gay Cafe was there too!
Friday was the day for panel discussions and Jeppis Pride was selling merchandise at the high school. I think my new Jeppis Pride shopping back is setting off alarms at stores, but I need to investigate further.
Being truly bilingual Pride, everything was in Swedish and in Finnish.
Our sinuiksi/Seta booth.
Seriously people, check out sinuiksi.fi. Also on twitter @sinuiksi.
Mikko and one of the organizers, Katarina.
Me with a smirk. I come out as a ax murderer in every picture, so don't mind me. I'm "quite ok" in real life and don't even own an ax.
Pietarsaari's mayor Mikael Jacobsson opened the Pride festival. "If even one person leaves here feeling like they are ok the way they are, Jeppis Pride has done its job"
Forssa Pride was also proud.
Right for culture panel discussion. I got some great ideas which I will try to make happen in Forssa in my limited time still here!
Panel discussion on trans issues.
We're already here! Art exhibition opening. After this we had a bite to eat and drinks with some fantastic, awesome people. No pictures were taken, but those people know who they are. I hope!
We finished our evening with a visit to the ocean.
Before the parade started. With someone's finger.
That flag was like a sail and with me having to carry 2 poles I got tired midway through and this gentleman was nice enough and offered to carry it for me.
Awesome rainbow dress. Unfortunately I don't remember her name, but she offered to carry some of the extra material we had with us. Same with few girls from Turku who had decided to come and support the Pride.
From After Eight after the parade.
I probably have not mentioned Sinuiksi-project yet, so you know, do your thing.
Pride organizer Jeanette on stage.
Sara Sundell brought the greetings from SETA to Jeppis Pride. One of those cool peeps I got to hang out with and who was telling me things about Finnish Swedish girls.
Mandatory picture of my iced coffee, with an ice-cream as a mixer.
I want to see Pride flags in Forssa as well. Working on that.
On our way home we came across a UFO.
Anyway, I want to thank Mikko, Sara, Aija, Suvi, Anna, Ulli, Heidi, Rita, Sirkka and all the other amazing and beautiful people I got to meet and hang out with this weekend and especially your willingness to speak Finnish around this language challenged person. I appreciated it! And to Jeppis Pride organizers: You should be really proud of yourselves, that was possibly the Pride event of the year! At least one of the best I've ever attended! Thank you!
(Edit: if we hung out and/or spoke and your name isn't on the list but you recognize yourself from the description, I'm sorry, I suck! Please forgive me?
Edit number 2: I never should have put any names here, I forgot a really obvious one, Jouko!)
Wednesday, March 19, 2014
Be still my shipper heart
Let's take a minute from the serious grind of Forssa Pride and Gay Cafe and Seta and human rights stuff and marriage equality and focus on something less serious but still so wonderfull (terrible).
At 33 and a half I'm probably too old to be swooning over fictional teenage lesbian couples and/or characters, and I sort of thought I was over my fixation on Glee and especially Brittana, but it turns out, I'm not. Not having Heather Morris on Glee anymore, and Santana having imaginary off screen girlfriend that we never see, and overall Glee sucking so badly I haven't watched an episode of Glee since before season 4 ended.
Now though, for the 100th episode they brought back all the originals and even gave Brittana a huge storyline and more importantly, a kiss (a hot one), on screen. And they talked about possibly getting back together. And there is no word on whether Heather Morris is ever getting back regularly or even as a guest star so the chances of all of this ending up well are very small.
I know this in my head, my over excited, love-story-loving, happily-ever-after believing heart is another matter. So when they released the video for Valerie I got excited. It even affected my sleep! I couldn't fall asleep last night, was up way past 1am (episode aired at 2am my time) and woke up over an hour before my alarm went off. And the fangirling that's happening on Tumblr? How am I supposed to resist and be a sane adult person?
Why couldn't they give us this when they were both on the show? Why do everything we ever wanted just for it to go away or happen off screen? Why are you doing this to me? WHY?
Wanna know what I'm doing tonight after work? Watching this frigging episode!
At 33 and a half I'm probably too old to be swooning over fictional teenage lesbian couples and/or characters, and I sort of thought I was over my fixation on Glee and especially Brittana, but it turns out, I'm not. Not having Heather Morris on Glee anymore, and Santana having imaginary off screen girlfriend that we never see, and overall Glee sucking so badly I haven't watched an episode of Glee since before season 4 ended.
Now though, for the 100th episode they brought back all the originals and even gave Brittana a huge storyline and more importantly, a kiss (a hot one), on screen. And they talked about possibly getting back together. And there is no word on whether Heather Morris is ever getting back regularly or even as a guest star so the chances of all of this ending up well are very small.
I know this in my head, my over excited, love-story-loving, happily-ever-after believing heart is another matter. So when they released the video for Valerie I got excited. It even affected my sleep! I couldn't fall asleep last night, was up way past 1am (episode aired at 2am my time) and woke up over an hour before my alarm went off. And the fangirling that's happening on Tumblr? How am I supposed to resist and be a sane adult person?
Why couldn't they give us this when they were both on the show? Why do everything we ever wanted just for it to go away or happen off screen? Why are you doing this to me? WHY?
Wanna know what I'm doing tonight after work? Watching this frigging episode!
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