Since I'm in Finland now I thought I should update my business cards so that my information is actually correct. You can order free business cards from Vista print and just pay the shipping and handling. That's what I did in USA after my professor told me they would come in handy, you don't necessarily have your resume with you at all time (you NEVER have your resume with you unless you're going to a job interview or a recruiting/job fair) but you always have room in your wallet/bag for few business cards and you never know when you meet up with a potential contact/employer and giving them your card is a great way to be remembered. It's a very useful tool in job hunting.
The selection for the free cards is a little smaller here than it was in USA and I am not as excited about my cards as I was with the first one but having old information with a phone number that doesn't work right now would probably be counterproductive! So I used one of their designs, put my Finnish info in there, pressed "order" and then realized I probably should have added my american number just in case...that way I could have used it both in Finland in the US. Well, you live and you learn. Next time.
I've noticed that there is a difference with the finnish way of communication vs. american. Finns don't really leave voicemails as americans usually do. That way you'll know whether the call was really important and needs to be returned ASAP or if it can wait. We either think that they will call back when they see who the caller was or as a receiver, if it was important the caller will call again. I'm a fan of the american way. Part of the reason why we don;t leave voicemails might be because it's not a standard service and not everybody has it.
Finns are also slower to reply to text messages/e-mails. I feel that I'm in the middle of the american vs. Finnish as in america I could be taken as being rude where I don't necessarily call/text right back and when I say bye on texts, I don't go back and forth time and again. When I'm in Finland I expect people to reply to my calls relatively soon and text me back right away...and when they don't I feel like they are ignoring me. I think with the mergence of iPhones and other smart phones with their applications and music players in the USA, people carry their phones everywhere with them and are in a position to reply right away. Most people in Finland have your basic Nokia that just texts and calls and it is not carried at all times. My pebl, as awesome as it was 5 years ago when I bought it, does not have any apps, doesn't play music and can't be used for playing games. I also receive so few calls and texts that half the time I forget I even have a phone and don't necessarily have it with me at all times. Since my MAC acts as my phone when I call Tiffany via Skype, I don't need my phone for that. I've also noticed that the battery life isn't what it used to and after 20 minute phone call the battery is pretty much dead. Even though Pebl was the greatest phone ever created and is my 4th love of life, I think after my first paycheck it might be time to upgrade. It'll be a sad day but I will need to deal.
Even though my once possible future boss does not want to reply to my e-mails anymore, americans usually reply quickly, even if it's just to say I got your e-mail and will get back to you shortly. Finns reply when they want to. We're slower like that.
More next time. Later
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
What politicians and athletes have in common?
Ever since I came back to Finland I have been fortunate enough to be able to follow the politics and election campaign of a girl from my home town. She is a candidate here even though she hasn't lived here in about 10 years. She's never been part of the local politics and hasn't served in the town council. I believe her only political experience is from being the chair person of the high school students union back in the day (about 8-10 years ago). Now she is the press assistant for the foreign minister of Finland...which I guess qualifies her to be an elected member of the finnish parliament.
Finland was announced to be the best place to live on earth/world's greatest country whatever whatever on Newsweek few weeks ago. It is based on the education, corruption or lack thereof, political stability and something else... I'm just gonna focus on the no corruption/transparency. We have the most honest politicians around, am I right? Since my arrival 2 months ago we have changed prime minister because he's suspected of being biased on giving out government money to an organization which gave him money for his campaign... that obviously isn't the official reason he left but he gave up his status as prime minister and is now being investigated. A MP from a nearby town was suspected of bribery which just this morning he was cleared, or should I say, the charges were dropped. He was speeding and when pulled over suggested to the cop that they should go get some coffee...major crime, I know, but the cop and the police force took it as a bribery attempt and charged him for it. I hope the number of times I've suggested a cup of coffee to someone isn't gonna come back to haunt me in the future! Now a minister is asked to provide information on her family member owning shares of a mining company. I did not read the article further as it's just gonna infuriate me. In the past few months few other MP's have been suspected of taking money from someone and either not reporting it or the organizations reputation being less than stellar.
This "local" wanna-be politician has been to every possible kissanristiäinen/ cat babtism (that's what we call all the small happenings where the local "cream" gather, where you can get your face seen, meet possible voters, an experience that you just have to have like the opening of the new shopping center, that in the grand scheme of things are not important happenings at all) there is on this area this summer. She has kick started her campaign with a bam. Some people here seem to think that it will bite her in the ass in the end, and I tend to agree. When it's time to vote, people around here have seen so much of her that they don't wanna have anything to do with her anymore. As for me...she represents a party that I would never ever vote for. This situation kind of reminds me of a conversation I had with my Aunt Minna few weeks ago. She told me they had been looking for a person to take care of kids at the kindergarden she works for...and one of the most outrageous applications said that the reason they could do the job was because she had been watching the people who take care of kids at their homes at the park/playground and it didn't look so difficult. No formal education to take care of kids. It's kinda like by working for a minister makes this girl qualified for being a MP. I'm not necessarily saying that she would be bad at it and there really isn't any "qualifications" to meet but to command respect and some kind of authority, I would like her to have some actual political experience, and more so, from Forssa. The only reason she can't do that is because she lives in Helsinki and to be a member of the town council, you NEED to live in that city. So if you can be a candidate here but live in Helsinki, why can't I vote for a candidate who is listed in Helsinki? Fair, I think.
Why I think politicians and athletes are the same? Majority of them are dirty. Maybe not even a majority but they always get caught. I think doping should be allowed in sports just so that the playing field would be even for all. If you think that running a 100m faster than anyone else is so important that it justifies having your balls shrink in a few years time and not being able to have kids, and having major mood swings and becoming violent is worth it, I say go for it! If having a brain aneurism is worth few years at the top of the sports world, be my guest. I would say that lets have the doping olympics and clean olympics but there would always be athletes at the clean olympics who would try to pass as clean but really weren't. What's the point of being clean when Marion Jones won the 100m + other events at the Sydney olympics only to get caught and confess few years later, for the gold medal to be awarded for a greek athlete who later herself got caught for using? Seems like plain old hard work doesn't really get you anywhere. Is few gold medals worth it when you start growing a beard? Even though your a woman? and having your breasts shrink? Your voice lower? Start looking like a man? I guess I cannot understand the appeal as I was never in a position to become a world class athlete. Thanks for that!
I guess the Finnish transparency is working as all these politicians are getting caught and investigated. I don't think it necessarily does any good for the Finnish reputation that we still do have these people who are willing to take campaign money from people and organizations that are less that reputable. Why don't we just open up the campaign funding to any and everybody? You be as blatantly biased as you wish and take money from whom ever. Vote for the things that your funders deem important and the hell with your voters! Let's all get connected!
Later peeps!
Finland was announced to be the best place to live on earth/world's greatest country whatever whatever on Newsweek few weeks ago. It is based on the education, corruption or lack thereof, political stability and something else... I'm just gonna focus on the no corruption/transparency. We have the most honest politicians around, am I right? Since my arrival 2 months ago we have changed prime minister because he's suspected of being biased on giving out government money to an organization which gave him money for his campaign... that obviously isn't the official reason he left but he gave up his status as prime minister and is now being investigated. A MP from a nearby town was suspected of bribery which just this morning he was cleared, or should I say, the charges were dropped. He was speeding and when pulled over suggested to the cop that they should go get some coffee...major crime, I know, but the cop and the police force took it as a bribery attempt and charged him for it. I hope the number of times I've suggested a cup of coffee to someone isn't gonna come back to haunt me in the future! Now a minister is asked to provide information on her family member owning shares of a mining company. I did not read the article further as it's just gonna infuriate me. In the past few months few other MP's have been suspected of taking money from someone and either not reporting it or the organizations reputation being less than stellar.
This "local" wanna-be politician has been to every possible kissanristiäinen/ cat babtism (that's what we call all the small happenings where the local "cream" gather, where you can get your face seen, meet possible voters, an experience that you just have to have like the opening of the new shopping center, that in the grand scheme of things are not important happenings at all) there is on this area this summer. She has kick started her campaign with a bam. Some people here seem to think that it will bite her in the ass in the end, and I tend to agree. When it's time to vote, people around here have seen so much of her that they don't wanna have anything to do with her anymore. As for me...she represents a party that I would never ever vote for. This situation kind of reminds me of a conversation I had with my Aunt Minna few weeks ago. She told me they had been looking for a person to take care of kids at the kindergarden she works for...and one of the most outrageous applications said that the reason they could do the job was because she had been watching the people who take care of kids at their homes at the park/playground and it didn't look so difficult. No formal education to take care of kids. It's kinda like by working for a minister makes this girl qualified for being a MP. I'm not necessarily saying that she would be bad at it and there really isn't any "qualifications" to meet but to command respect and some kind of authority, I would like her to have some actual political experience, and more so, from Forssa. The only reason she can't do that is because she lives in Helsinki and to be a member of the town council, you NEED to live in that city. So if you can be a candidate here but live in Helsinki, why can't I vote for a candidate who is listed in Helsinki? Fair, I think.
Why I think politicians and athletes are the same? Majority of them are dirty. Maybe not even a majority but they always get caught. I think doping should be allowed in sports just so that the playing field would be even for all. If you think that running a 100m faster than anyone else is so important that it justifies having your balls shrink in a few years time and not being able to have kids, and having major mood swings and becoming violent is worth it, I say go for it! If having a brain aneurism is worth few years at the top of the sports world, be my guest. I would say that lets have the doping olympics and clean olympics but there would always be athletes at the clean olympics who would try to pass as clean but really weren't. What's the point of being clean when Marion Jones won the 100m + other events at the Sydney olympics only to get caught and confess few years later, for the gold medal to be awarded for a greek athlete who later herself got caught for using? Seems like plain old hard work doesn't really get you anywhere. Is few gold medals worth it when you start growing a beard? Even though your a woman? and having your breasts shrink? Your voice lower? Start looking like a man? I guess I cannot understand the appeal as I was never in a position to become a world class athlete. Thanks for that!
I guess the Finnish transparency is working as all these politicians are getting caught and investigated. I don't think it necessarily does any good for the Finnish reputation that we still do have these people who are willing to take campaign money from people and organizations that are less that reputable. Why don't we just open up the campaign funding to any and everybody? You be as blatantly biased as you wish and take money from whom ever. Vote for the things that your funders deem important and the hell with your voters! Let's all get connected!
Later peeps!
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Sense of humor and how important it is
I read an article on Iltasanomat today about a british woman who had suffered from migraines all her life. One night she went to bed after having a migraine only to wake up with a french accent! She said that she had to quit her job in sales because it was hard speaking with the accent and that she feels like she has lost a part of herself. According to the article she has also lost few words, such as a, of and to. But she did say that even though she lost her personality, identity and her own voice, she still has her sense of humor! BAM! There you go french people, no sense of humor...or so I would read it! ;-)
It is very important quality to have...even if other people wouldn't understand your humor, as long as you can find things to laugh about, you're golden. It is not always easy though. Being miles, hours and hundreds of dollars/euros away from your loved one(s), what is there to laugh about? No job and no money equals tough times. It's not easy to feel good about yourself when you don;t get that outside validation...staying home with nothing but job hunting to do gets daunting, boring, exhausting. Doing that for a year and a half...you try it. I don't recommend it. Where is that one letter, e-mail or phone call that will say YES, we will be happy to have you?
So I try to laugh... I laughed when I talked to Tiffany about baby names (her sister-in-laws brother's wife is having a baby today, the family whose kids I took care of for a while this year) and I asked her if she knew what the name was gonna be...she replied "it's gonna be a zoo". Of course that wasn't the answer to my question but for a second it seemed like it was. That made me laugh...and was told only me can come up with that!
I laughed when I saw this picture
It's a bear in a ZOO in Finland doing yoga! How cute is that? And funny? Maybe I should try it and see if it would help with my back? I was supposed to stretch whenever Bailey stretches but since I don't see Bailey every day anymore, I don't know exactly when she's stretching...Wasn't working even when I was but it was a good thought.
I laughed when I was going through job postings and saw that a bishop in Lapua was looking for a secretary. I asked my mom and Ybi if I should apply and they answered at the same time:YES! It was all joke of course...I don't think religious organizations would want to hire me...nor would I want to work for them so I guess we are even!
I also laughed when I read that Togo played a friendly against Bahrain last week...but it wasn't really Togo! How is it possible in this day and age with internet galore to not know which team you are playing and whether they are legit or no? As the president of the Togolese Football federation, when the international friendly list was published, didn't you pay attention to the part where Togo was mentioned to be playing in Bahrain? Maybe this should be used as an excuse for Finnish football too...it was NOT team Finland playing in Moldova and we don;t know who those players were. Ebven though it said "Litmanen" on number 10's back, I don't think it was him... and number 4, supposedly Hyypiä, was not him either...and as such shouldn't have been given a 1 game ban! So there, I solved it. The team representing Finland in the Euro qualifications really isn't Finland!
Maybe I will post more things to laugh about later on...maybe I won't. Later
It is very important quality to have...even if other people wouldn't understand your humor, as long as you can find things to laugh about, you're golden. It is not always easy though. Being miles, hours and hundreds of dollars/euros away from your loved one(s), what is there to laugh about? No job and no money equals tough times. It's not easy to feel good about yourself when you don;t get that outside validation...staying home with nothing but job hunting to do gets daunting, boring, exhausting. Doing that for a year and a half...you try it. I don't recommend it. Where is that one letter, e-mail or phone call that will say YES, we will be happy to have you?
So I try to laugh... I laughed when I talked to Tiffany about baby names (her sister-in-laws brother's wife is having a baby today, the family whose kids I took care of for a while this year) and I asked her if she knew what the name was gonna be...she replied "it's gonna be a zoo". Of course that wasn't the answer to my question but for a second it seemed like it was. That made me laugh...and was told only me can come up with that!
I laughed when I saw this picture
It's a bear in a ZOO in Finland doing yoga! How cute is that? And funny? Maybe I should try it and see if it would help with my back? I was supposed to stretch whenever Bailey stretches but since I don't see Bailey every day anymore, I don't know exactly when she's stretching...Wasn't working even when I was but it was a good thought.
I laughed when I was going through job postings and saw that a bishop in Lapua was looking for a secretary. I asked my mom and Ybi if I should apply and they answered at the same time:YES! It was all joke of course...I don't think religious organizations would want to hire me...nor would I want to work for them so I guess we are even!
I also laughed when I read that Togo played a friendly against Bahrain last week...but it wasn't really Togo! How is it possible in this day and age with internet galore to not know which team you are playing and whether they are legit or no? As the president of the Togolese Football federation, when the international friendly list was published, didn't you pay attention to the part where Togo was mentioned to be playing in Bahrain? Maybe this should be used as an excuse for Finnish football too...it was NOT team Finland playing in Moldova and we don;t know who those players were. Ebven though it said "Litmanen" on number 10's back, I don't think it was him... and number 4, supposedly Hyypiä, was not him either...and as such shouldn't have been given a 1 game ban! So there, I solved it. The team representing Finland in the Euro qualifications really isn't Finland!
Maybe I will post more things to laugh about later on...maybe I won't. Later
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Ah, bureaucracy how I love thee
WARNING! Few curse words might be detected!
So...I'm still unemployed and as such I am qualified to apply for unemployment benefits from Finland, now that I'm actually IN Finland. The process is as follows: You go to the local (un)employment agency, either in person or online, and register as unemployed job seeker. Did that yesterday. Then you go over to get an official statement saying that you qualify to apply for unemployment. After that you apply in another agency for the benefits...
I went to the local unemployment agency today to get my statement. I was assisted by this woman who was so fed up with her job and had absolutely no interest. This is how the conversation went.
Me: graduated from MSU 2009...student visa granted 1 year of practical training which I was unable to find....been looking for a job since May 2009...was not under US social security....only allowed to work in my filed of study....
She looks at my information that I submitted yesterday. You're still part of the Engineering Union unemployment fund? No. What is your profession? I guess I'd be an Environmental Engineer. You are looking in the environmental field I see? Yes. Would you be willing to do other jobs? I guess I would. Have you considered more education? NO, I JUST GRADUATED WITH A MASTERS A YEAR AGO, I HAVE LOANS AND BILLS TO PAY!
Are you fucking kidding me???? more education? What am I supposed to do, go a to a frigging secretary school or something?
Then we get to the part of discussing my job search while in USA... she proceeds to tell me that I will be facing a 2 month wait on my unemployment benefits since I cannot proof that I was job searching while there. I asked her how am I supposed to proof that? as far as I understand I was not allowed to register in a local governmental/state unemployment agency just because I was not under their social security and I was not allowed to do just any job...I was there on a student visa and under the regulation I am not supposed to be a burden to the US. And I bet if would have frustrated the hell out of me! I said I had been job searching full time but from job sites and through my networking... apparently that's not enough because I have no official letter proving anything! Then she asks me if I have had a child during the past year because that way I could proof that I was not able to work! What an ASSHOLE! First of all, they don't have 9 month maternity leave like we do so having a child doesn't proof anything. Second of all, are you gonna make me feel bad about not foreseeing this and not having a child just so that I can proof something to you and your stupid rules? F U!
I need to come up with a letter from my former boss at MSU stating my employment time, duties, salary, hours, reason for terminating my employment etc...then I need to get a letter from the school stating that I studied and graduated there.
I also did my unemployment benefit application on the website of this other agency...after all the questions that I answered I still need to get a letter from my school stating the hours I worked per week and how much I earned each week from the year that I worked for MSU global ed. so I sent a letter to the payroll person who I dealt with while there. I have a feeling he is so busy that he won't have time to do this for me. And this information needs to be at the agency by the end of the month.
I have a meeting with the unemployment agency next Wednesday the 25th so I hope my former boss and the advisor have sent me the letters by then.
Bureaucracy...what a beautiful thing. I am gonna plead my case with everybody because there's nothing I can do about immigration regulations... Some things should be evaluated case-by-case basis. Right now it would be easier if I could just find a job and not have to worry about this bullshit. Nothing is ever easy.
UPDATE: My former boss at MSU said she will write me this letter. Payroll on the other hand...I sent him a letter telling him I was an international student at MSU between May 2008 and May 2009 and that I was applying for unemployment benefits from MY HOME COUNTRY. Gave him all the information needed in the letter...he forwards the e-mail to his colleague who sent me an e-mail: As a student worker at MSU you are not eligible for unemployment benefits. I KNOW! I am NOt applying for american benefits though am I?!?!?! How about you READ the e-mail before you answer...
I need a drink!
So...I'm still unemployed and as such I am qualified to apply for unemployment benefits from Finland, now that I'm actually IN Finland. The process is as follows: You go to the local (un)employment agency, either in person or online, and register as unemployed job seeker. Did that yesterday. Then you go over to get an official statement saying that you qualify to apply for unemployment. After that you apply in another agency for the benefits...
I went to the local unemployment agency today to get my statement. I was assisted by this woman who was so fed up with her job and had absolutely no interest. This is how the conversation went.
Me: graduated from MSU 2009...student visa granted 1 year of practical training which I was unable to find....been looking for a job since May 2009...was not under US social security....only allowed to work in my filed of study....
She looks at my information that I submitted yesterday. You're still part of the Engineering Union unemployment fund? No. What is your profession? I guess I'd be an Environmental Engineer. You are looking in the environmental field I see? Yes. Would you be willing to do other jobs? I guess I would. Have you considered more education? NO, I JUST GRADUATED WITH A MASTERS A YEAR AGO, I HAVE LOANS AND BILLS TO PAY!
Are you fucking kidding me???? more education? What am I supposed to do, go a to a frigging secretary school or something?
Then we get to the part of discussing my job search while in USA... she proceeds to tell me that I will be facing a 2 month wait on my unemployment benefits since I cannot proof that I was job searching while there. I asked her how am I supposed to proof that? as far as I understand I was not allowed to register in a local governmental/state unemployment agency just because I was not under their social security and I was not allowed to do just any job...I was there on a student visa and under the regulation I am not supposed to be a burden to the US. And I bet if would have frustrated the hell out of me! I said I had been job searching full time but from job sites and through my networking... apparently that's not enough because I have no official letter proving anything! Then she asks me if I have had a child during the past year because that way I could proof that I was not able to work! What an ASSHOLE! First of all, they don't have 9 month maternity leave like we do so having a child doesn't proof anything. Second of all, are you gonna make me feel bad about not foreseeing this and not having a child just so that I can proof something to you and your stupid rules? F U!
I need to come up with a letter from my former boss at MSU stating my employment time, duties, salary, hours, reason for terminating my employment etc...then I need to get a letter from the school stating that I studied and graduated there.
I also did my unemployment benefit application on the website of this other agency...after all the questions that I answered I still need to get a letter from my school stating the hours I worked per week and how much I earned each week from the year that I worked for MSU global ed. so I sent a letter to the payroll person who I dealt with while there. I have a feeling he is so busy that he won't have time to do this for me. And this information needs to be at the agency by the end of the month.
I have a meeting with the unemployment agency next Wednesday the 25th so I hope my former boss and the advisor have sent me the letters by then.
Bureaucracy...what a beautiful thing. I am gonna plead my case with everybody because there's nothing I can do about immigration regulations... Some things should be evaluated case-by-case basis. Right now it would be easier if I could just find a job and not have to worry about this bullshit. Nothing is ever easy.
UPDATE: My former boss at MSU said she will write me this letter. Payroll on the other hand...I sent him a letter telling him I was an international student at MSU between May 2008 and May 2009 and that I was applying for unemployment benefits from MY HOME COUNTRY. Gave him all the information needed in the letter...he forwards the e-mail to his colleague who sent me an e-mail: As a student worker at MSU you are not eligible for unemployment benefits. I KNOW! I am NOt applying for american benefits though am I?!?!?! How about you READ the e-mail before you answer...
I need a drink!
Monday, August 9, 2010
Hakkapeliitta weekend
Old fashioned coffee cart
My mom's booth
Started to write this at the beginning of August, it's now September 15...
before I go all into detail about this weekend I should probably explain the terms and situation... Hakkapeliitta is the term for the Finnish men who fought for Sweden in the 1700's. Every year the first weekend of August there's an event in Tammela (small town in Finland) to commemorate those people. The market place is basically tranferred into the 1700's, people come from all over the area dressed in the clothes from that era, selling goods and foods from that era. there's a king and queen who are very well dressed and their court and they ride their horse carriage, wave and talk to the everyday folk and greet their underlings...the food is amazing and you could spend a small fortune buying some of this stuff. It's all quality goods and most people have made their products themselves so everyone takes good care and pride of it all. So keeping that in mind...
My stepdad Ybi has sold his art there for the past 20 or so years. He's part of the organizing committee and does all the posters and advertising pictures of the events. Most if not all people associated with the organizing are volunteers and it could not survive without their work. I don't think anybody is getting paid for this and it's a lot of work to get everything together. My mom started her business last year (upholstery, repairs, curtains etc) and she just got her own trademark/logo about a month ago so she has been making handbags, shopping bags, maternity bags, gym bags etc to sell there. I am not into the brand name american bags that everybody is raving about in america, but I could have a bag for everyday of the week from my moms collection. I'm not a girly girl so these are perfect for me. Anyway...This is a 2 day affair and both My mom Marja and Ybi had their own booths there. As part of being in the organizing committee Ybi was one of the 3 judges who gave out the "best booth award" so while he was looking at the booths I was covering for him. And from his booth I went to my moms. Felt like by-polar...one minute I'm an artist and the next an artisan. It was hot as hell this weekend and we needed to dress the part so it was even hotter.
There were a lot of people there and I saw some people I went to school with but haven't seen in ages...saw some people from my former job, relatives...My Aunt Minna had her own booth as well. She does animals from wool, she felts them (I didn't know what the word was so I used an online dictionary...which I have told many people NOT to use...so if this is not the real term, my apologies. Felt is the name of the material...it would be huopa in Finnish). She once made a cat for Tiffany from a picture of Sox I showed her...
I saw a lot of old classmates from all the levels of school. People I haven't met in years, people I've lost touch with and people I only talk to on Facebook, if even there. Lot of people came over to talk to me, ask me about my life and catch up in general...Afterwards I got few fb friend requests which obviously let me to see their profiles. There must be something in the water since I feel like EVERYBODY either has kids or is pregnant. And it's not just 1 kid, it seems like it's 3! They have their houses, husbands/wives, kids and most importantly, A LIFE. Which seems to be just outside my reach. I turned 30 few weeks ago and for a long time I have been ready to settle down, get married or civil unioned or whatever the governments give us and have kids, a house, mortgage, bills etc with Tiffany. It just won't happen. I failed to get a job from US which is why we are living separate right now...I've so far failed to get a job in Finland which is why I'm living in my moms living room... not exactly the way I pictured my life at 30.
I have some issues I need to talk about so I will finish this post and go on to the next.
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Proposition 8
So I just read that Prop. 8 has been overturned by a federal judge. For those of you who don't know what it means...few years back California approved same sex marriage. People got married and were happy only to have the religious right (the republicans) to get it into a vote by the californians and for them to decide whether gay marriage should be approved or not...well they decided that it was not ok for the gay californians to marry so it was overturned. A Couple of gay guys who got married while it was still legal sued and the judge now ruled that the the law was unconstitutional...Awesome news!
Why I am not overly joyed right now is because all though it's great news and a nice first step, it can still be overturned...again. And even if it wasn't, it still doesn't help me and Tiffany. It's a step to the right direction but we're still so far away from a situation where me and Tiffany can breathe easy. What we need to happen is for this immigration reform that's being suggested to include same sex couples the right to sponsor their foreign partner so that situations that we now are in won't have to happen again. No couple should have to face the choice between their home country and their spouse. No couple should face the situation where one of you needs to leave because staying would be violating the law. No couple should face the situation of a long distance relationship unless they want to.
Now I know my particular situation isn't the most extreme or heartbreaking or dangerous. I'm not facing jail time, persecution or hardship because I'm gay in Finland. Hell, I could "marry" Tiffany and get her here in a second. The fact is, for financial reasons and for career reasons, it would be easier for the both of us to live in the States. I will never be able to make as much money here as I would there. It would be harder for Tiffany to be here since she doesn't speak the language and let's face it, Finnish is not exactly the easiest to learn. It's not just about money though...In my chosen field I could make a lot of money if I wanted to (and if someone would hire me) but I wouldn't mind working in some other field, doing something else either. The fact is, the law that prevents Tiffany from marrying/sponsoring me also prevents me from working in any other field than environmental. They do not make it easy...
Now my straight friends...can you tell me how my right to marry Tiffany and legally call her my wife/spouse affects your relationship? Your marriage? Your potential to find a spouse? Your divorce? Your ability have children? The way I see it is that what happens in my house or in my bedroom is my business and not yours...and what happens in your house or your bedroom is yours. How is cheating on your spouse keeping the "sanctity" of marriage in tact? How does a divorce fare with the sanctity of marriage? How does you marrying multiple times and getting multiple divorces go with the sanctity of marriage? As long as the marriage included one man and one woman it is ok to beat, cheat, ignore and divorce and remarry? It was between a man and a woman so it is ok? Please check the divorce rates of the western "civilization". Half if not more marriages these days ends up in a divorce. Those are all your numbers. I'm not included. I'm not making your precious marriage/divorce numbers any uglier. I can't. You won't let me. So enjoy that probability my friend. 50-50.
Finland is talking about "sex neutral marriage law" or something to that affect. Right now same sex couples have the right to marry or register their relationship but cannot adopt. There are few other issues that do not make the marriages equal but I cannot remember them all. This new law would give everybody the same rights and would also take the words man and a woman from the description of marriage. I am not gonna get all emotional about this just yet because right now the most important part of my ability to marry Tiffany is the fact that I could get her here, get her a permanent residency and get her permission to work and study. And it would be fairly simple process, not expensive nor time consuming. But if the situation would arise where we need to stay in Finland, I would very much like for us to have joint custody of our future children and if anything happened to either one of us, for the other one not having to worry about custody or lack thereof.
I'm done now...It's late and I'm getting tired. Tomorrow I have a date with 6 kittens so I need to be awake for that! A friend of mine is fostering a mama cat and her kittens and since I don't have daily interaction with cats anymore, I am going to get my kitty cat loving from these kittens.
Good night. I'm out!
Why I am not overly joyed right now is because all though it's great news and a nice first step, it can still be overturned...again. And even if it wasn't, it still doesn't help me and Tiffany. It's a step to the right direction but we're still so far away from a situation where me and Tiffany can breathe easy. What we need to happen is for this immigration reform that's being suggested to include same sex couples the right to sponsor their foreign partner so that situations that we now are in won't have to happen again. No couple should have to face the choice between their home country and their spouse. No couple should face the situation where one of you needs to leave because staying would be violating the law. No couple should face the situation of a long distance relationship unless they want to.
Now I know my particular situation isn't the most extreme or heartbreaking or dangerous. I'm not facing jail time, persecution or hardship because I'm gay in Finland. Hell, I could "marry" Tiffany and get her here in a second. The fact is, for financial reasons and for career reasons, it would be easier for the both of us to live in the States. I will never be able to make as much money here as I would there. It would be harder for Tiffany to be here since she doesn't speak the language and let's face it, Finnish is not exactly the easiest to learn. It's not just about money though...In my chosen field I could make a lot of money if I wanted to (and if someone would hire me) but I wouldn't mind working in some other field, doing something else either. The fact is, the law that prevents Tiffany from marrying/sponsoring me also prevents me from working in any other field than environmental. They do not make it easy...
Now my straight friends...can you tell me how my right to marry Tiffany and legally call her my wife/spouse affects your relationship? Your marriage? Your potential to find a spouse? Your divorce? Your ability have children? The way I see it is that what happens in my house or in my bedroom is my business and not yours...and what happens in your house or your bedroom is yours. How is cheating on your spouse keeping the "sanctity" of marriage in tact? How does a divorce fare with the sanctity of marriage? How does you marrying multiple times and getting multiple divorces go with the sanctity of marriage? As long as the marriage included one man and one woman it is ok to beat, cheat, ignore and divorce and remarry? It was between a man and a woman so it is ok? Please check the divorce rates of the western "civilization". Half if not more marriages these days ends up in a divorce. Those are all your numbers. I'm not included. I'm not making your precious marriage/divorce numbers any uglier. I can't. You won't let me. So enjoy that probability my friend. 50-50.
Finland is talking about "sex neutral marriage law" or something to that affect. Right now same sex couples have the right to marry or register their relationship but cannot adopt. There are few other issues that do not make the marriages equal but I cannot remember them all. This new law would give everybody the same rights and would also take the words man and a woman from the description of marriage. I am not gonna get all emotional about this just yet because right now the most important part of my ability to marry Tiffany is the fact that I could get her here, get her a permanent residency and get her permission to work and study. And it would be fairly simple process, not expensive nor time consuming. But if the situation would arise where we need to stay in Finland, I would very much like for us to have joint custody of our future children and if anything happened to either one of us, for the other one not having to worry about custody or lack thereof.
I'm done now...It's late and I'm getting tired. Tomorrow I have a date with 6 kittens so I need to be awake for that! A friend of mine is fostering a mama cat and her kittens and since I don't have daily interaction with cats anymore, I am going to get my kitty cat loving from these kittens.
Good night. I'm out!
Sunday, August 1, 2010
Quality time with my brother
So yesterday Arttu took me to see Inception and afterwards we went to the roof terrace/ katto terassi for drinks. The movie was kinda weird, I think after seeing shutter Island it kind of followed on that path... Movie itself was ok but nothing that I would like to or need to see again. One thing that caught my eye and that wasn't necessarily what I needed to see in my current state of mind was the fact that one of the characters was seeing a "reflection" of his now dead wife...and he was actively looking to see her and tried to find her.
Afterwards we went for drinks and had a chance to really catch up and talk about things. It's amazing to get to know your brother little better. He's 10 years younger than me so we haven't ever really had the same interests or hobbies or friends so now being able to hear my grown up brother talk and tell me how he feels about a certain things is great. However long my stay here is this is one thing I will enjoy; to get to know my brother. We will try to make this a regular thing...I just need to find a job/ win the lottery so that I can pay for it!
The past few weeks have been really hot in Finland and it seems like I brought a little bit of extra with me as Thursday was the hottest day in the Finnish recorded history...37,5degree Celcius/ 99 degree F! Almost broke that 100...It's not humid here so it doesn't feel as bad as it does in NYC but it's not like you enjoy being outside either. I tried sitting outside drinking coffee but came inside after few minutes. Now it's back to normal, nice and sunny but not too hot.
I have been enjoying almost all the foods that I missed while in the States. On my first day here my mom bought salmon and made gravlox...I can still taste it in my mouth...so GOOD! And on top of rye bread...yummy! I have definitely had my share of rye bread...I've had my favorite salmiakki, had a good czech sauna beer, had some chocolate, had not so healthy food from grill, went to hese for fries and mayo...yum! I still need to get my fave yogurt and go get some ice cream but right now I'm just enjoying my mom's cooking.
Hope to have some positive news next week...I'll be back.
Later
Afterwards we went for drinks and had a chance to really catch up and talk about things. It's amazing to get to know your brother little better. He's 10 years younger than me so we haven't ever really had the same interests or hobbies or friends so now being able to hear my grown up brother talk and tell me how he feels about a certain things is great. However long my stay here is this is one thing I will enjoy; to get to know my brother. We will try to make this a regular thing...I just need to find a job/ win the lottery so that I can pay for it!
The past few weeks have been really hot in Finland and it seems like I brought a little bit of extra with me as Thursday was the hottest day in the Finnish recorded history...37,5degree Celcius/ 99 degree F! Almost broke that 100...It's not humid here so it doesn't feel as bad as it does in NYC but it's not like you enjoy being outside either. I tried sitting outside drinking coffee but came inside after few minutes. Now it's back to normal, nice and sunny but not too hot.
I have been enjoying almost all the foods that I missed while in the States. On my first day here my mom bought salmon and made gravlox...I can still taste it in my mouth...so GOOD! And on top of rye bread...yummy! I have definitely had my share of rye bread...I've had my favorite salmiakki, had a good czech sauna beer, had some chocolate, had not so healthy food from grill, went to hese for fries and mayo...yum! I still need to get my fave yogurt and go get some ice cream but right now I'm just enjoying my mom's cooking.
Hope to have some positive news next week...I'll be back.
Later
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)