The great expectations

Few weeks ago when I was out partying with Heidi we met up with a couple of her straight girlfriends. Why do I mention them being straight you ask? Well, let me tell you.

One of them had boy trouble. And the minutes we sat with them, it was all about the boy trouble. Should I call him? Should I text him? What do I say? What if he doesn't answer me? Oh god, what he does? And on and on... That was a stereotypical straight girl behavior. And it was the type of drama I have no patience for. And I said so to Heidi. She gave me another point of view though. The girl's self esteem was low and that's how she validated herself. Through a man. The objective of the night was not to have fun with her friends but to attract a man or the man.

One of the great things about being a lesbian is that there are no expectations for your partner as far as the society is concerned. Whereas in some (straight) circles your value as a woman is realized by your ability to attract a handsome, educated, well off man, who will provide for you, there are none of that for lesbians. Nobody tells you to settle down with a beautiful successful lawyer/doctor/CEO. That's not the standard set forward for lady lovin ladies. No. It's more of the opposite. Unless you know lesbians and have them in your life, the expectation is that a) you're not the most beautiful or attractive woman on earth, b) you hate men, c) you can't get a man,  or d) you're manly which means that other lesbians are like that, so really, having a beautiful girlfriend is not necessarily expected.

And now that I think about it, it's kind of sad. We are already viewed as inferior because we're freaks or unnatural or not the norm, so why expect any better. We are free of the societal expectations, but we're also left alone. Basically the only people who care enough to ask about my love life are my immediate family and friends. I doubt my co-workers would ever ask me about my potential partner and even if they wondered about it, I doubt they'd be comfortable enough to ask.

I think I had a point when I started to write this but it got lost along the way. 'Till next time.