Today's interview

Here's a link to listen to my interview from Radio Häme later today. It starts at 4:15pm Finnish time (GMT+2). You should tune in at around 4, because last time it started a little early. I'll post the links when they are available after the interview has aired.

I also made a decision today that I'm vary excited about and even got an endorsment from somebody whose opinion I value very much! I can't say anything more, but you'll hear about it come Fall!

Happy Forssa Pride Party 2.0 day! I'll see you at Bar54!

Edited: Link to a small text version of my interview in Finnish.

Radio interview

I'll be on the airwaves tomorrow at 16:15 Finnish time talking about Forssa Pride Party 2.0 and Gay Cafe. The station is Radio Häme 96.0. And starting at around 10pm you can find me from Bar54 for Forssa Pride! See you there

Mail order biker chick

Supposedly it's spring time now, although you wouldn't necessarily get that from the weather we've been having but calendar says it is and if the lightness of my mood is any indication, it definitely is. As there are no lesbians in Forssa that I can see, nor do I think there are any biker chicks that are into women, I think I should order one from the mail? The increasing sun and slowly warming temperatures just make me feel like I should be on a bike. And since I don't own one, nor do I have the drivers license or the means to get one, the logical conclusion is to have a girlfriend who has one, right?

I went to body pump class today in my brand new Forssa Pride Party 2.0 training shirt. I originally was only gonna wear it for the 10k in June, but after talking with a friend she made me realize it would be a good way to advertise as well, since my gaydar peeps at some of the people there. Yesterday I also took a poster to my gym after the owner gave me a green light and it's the first thing you see when you enter the place. Hard to miss. I love it!

I went to Pirkanmaan Seta's english speaking rainbow group on Monday after missing it for the past 6 months and I gotta say, I felt and still feel the energy burst I got from talking with those guys. It's like the best possible pick-me-up and I feel sorry for the people who are sitting at their homes rather than finding the courage to come to our meetings in Forssa. I understand that I'm out and totally ok in my skin and that's not the case for many gays out there but still...As a closeted or questioning LGBT person living in Forssa area, there are no resources to help them accept themselves other than the internet and whatever information and friends you are able to find from chat rooms, message boards or tumblr. And then there's our Gay Cafe and the bi-annual Forssa Pride. And going to Forssa Pride if you're closeted is a huge step that not many is willing to take. We could help them find themselves or at least work towards that and if they are not taking this opportunity to use us now, it might be too late next fall. And I cannot emphasize the validation and joy you get from speaking with a like-minded people who understand what you are going through, what you are feeling and how terrifying it can be.

Volunteering at FSMS has brought new dimensions into my life and some people I might have not met was I not involved with this organizations. They are doing an amazing and selfless job that not many is willing to do. And tomorrow we're gathering for a spring welcoming meal together.

Forssa Pride Party 2.0 is 2 days away and I hope to see some of my readers there. If any of you are coming, could you come and talk to me and tell me why you are reading my blog? I'd really like to know.

Body switch

I don't know who this person is who's taken over my body, but I like her! Now when she leaves, I hope she'll leave me with a tone body...

I don't think I can emphasize enough how lazy I am. Like really. I believe in last minute panic and not doing things if I don't have to. (This is good to divulge now in case my soulmate reads this and later on accuses me of not giving a full disclosure.) And housework is the last thing I ever wanna do. Cleaning, dishes...yuck! But, this does not mean I have dirty dishes everywhere or trash on the floor, it just means that quite often my things don't find their way back to their places. Doesn't bother me until it does. Then it's a full on spring/x-mas/special occasion cleaning. Since I know myself, I have been trying to tackle some of these things in advance. My apartment was supposed to be clean for Forssa Pride so I could have my friends over, but since they're not coming, I don't have to be in as tip-top shape as I thought. So...maybe I'll clean, maybe I won't.

But, today is day 7 of my 7 day exercise week and I've mapped out a new route for my run. Originally the plan was to go to body pump class today but I thought since it's a gorgeous spring day with plenty of sun, why not go for a run? There's no way I'd ever be able to compete at a top level in any sport because I'm a quitter. Can't lie. I don't push myself hard enough when it comes to exercising and I am fully aware of it. So I'm super impressed with myself for sticking with this. Tomorrow I'm going to Tampere after work so it'll be a day off but on Tuesday and Thursday I'll go running and on Wednesday a body pump class. But today I've already gone grocery shopping, am about to go running, will do the dishes and cook 2 meals. Who does that? Not me! And I took the kitties outside for a walk with a friend and Brooklyn escaped and I had a heart attack...thankfully I was able to catch him but boy did he have fun while free. No treats for him today.

So, who ever this person doing these things is, I hope you stay for a long time or at least leave my body in a better condition than it was when you took over!

One hit wonder

Forssa Pride is one week away and the same worry and doubt I experienced before the first one is slowly creeping in. What if no one shows up? We have less people signed up than last time and all my friends are fleeing abroad or are not in the area that day (or are mom's to a month old). Last time We had no numbers to expect; We were fearing for the worst but hoping for the best and 184 people showed up. This time We have expectations, well I do at least. And I announced that We will try to outnumber Sirkka-Liisa Anttila's municipality elections vote count and have at least 219 in attendance. What if nobody shows up? What if Forssa Pride is a one hit wonder? And I have the absolute BEST idea for the 3rd party, if We're able to have it. Please people, show up!

Jenni of the year

I'm nominating myself for a "Jenni of the year"- award, because I totally deserve it!

I'm super lazy and if I can find an excuse to skip something I'm not exactly enthusiastic about, I will use it. This applies to cleaning, washing dishes and exercising. So today, I was once again alone at the peer group meeting and bummed out about it. I came home and opened my tax return envelope from last year and got some fabulous news! My mood switched from pissed off to great in a second!

I've set a mid goal for my getting into shape to run the 10km at Suvi-Ilta in June for Forssa Pride next (weeks) Friday. As I've said, I want some of the excess around my stomach to tighten up by then, and to be able to run a little longer than a minute. Well, today after all this, I went for a run and ran the whole 2,5km. The first half, running away I used the disappointment from peer group to fuel me and coming back I used the tax returns to keep me going. And it was raining!  Raining, I tell ya! And I ran and I ran and I ran...and I sweat. Since I have all kinds of things planned for next week and only 4 days before Forssa Pride, I decided, provided my body can take it, to exercise each of the 7 days of this week. Yesterday I went for body pump class, today I ran, tomorrow another body pump, on Thursday after the evening event at work to introduce the bike lane plans to the public, I'm planning on going for a jog, and then from Friday through Sunday more body pump classes. Next week I might only be able to do one body pump class and maybe go running twice, so it's crunch time. I'm focused. I'm ready. Six pack is just around the corner!

In another news... a former Forssa-dweller sent me a private message today on FB asking me about Forssa Pride and peer group etc. She said she heard a rumor there was FPP coming up but hadn't seen any ads for it and that she googled it and saw my interview and that's how she found me...I was curious as to what's out there on me and found a list of all the shows that Forssa Theater has done and found my name there! All of the 3 shows I did as a kid. The world doesn't know what it lost when I decided not to pursue acting as a serious career!

I'm going crazy

I think I've mentioned my serious distaste for both jogging and doing the dishes before, but in case I haven't: I hate jogging, it should be illegal and if I could, I would hire someone to do my dishes or if there was an ecological and economical way to use paper plates, I'd use them.

So why is it that I have done the dishes twice today, without running out of clean dish ware and have gone jogging? And now, at 8pm, when it's so nice and bright outside, I feel like I should go for another jog? What's wrong with me?

I've never really gone to the gym or exercised with a serious commitment during the weekend, but this was the third Saturday in a row when I went to the 11am Body Pump class and today I went for a jog. If you get into a rhythm with weekend gym, if and when you go out of town for a weekend and don't do your usual routine, you start feeling guilty about it. That's what happens to me anyway. But now, with the 10k looming in the not so distant future, and Forssa Pride Party 2.0 2 weeks away, and me still carrying this non-pregnancy, pregnancy ring around my buddha, I've increased the frequency and intensity of my exercising. And I'm thinking about adding a 4th Body Pump into my week for this week and maybe I need to go jogging every day as well if I want to see any serious progress before the 26th. It wouldn't hurt with the preparations for the 10k either, provided that my body can handle it.

Body issues, gotta hate 'em!

Next week we are introducing the bike lane plans to the public on Thursday. I'm all of a sudden super busy at work but that's good, the day(s) go faster. I feel like there's 2 days in my work week these days; Monday and Friday. Nothing exists in between.

Until next time...

What makes a parent?

Is it DNA? law? Intent? Marriage? Love?

One of the arguments the opposition uses to justify their stand on gay marriage is procreation. Same sex couples cannot create a child with both their DNA's, so they shouldn't be equally recognized in front of the law. Because there isn't enough people on this earth already. But I won't argue the "straight couples who can't have kids together shouldn't have the right to marry either" point here.

It seems that creating a child and not loving/supporting/taking care of them is made easier than wanting/loving and having one. And to be legally recognized as a parent isn't made easy either. Having a child that's legally recognized as the child of a same sex couple is made difficult, but it seems that having a child out of "wedlock" isn't the state preferred option either, even if the commitment, love , DNA and intent to be a parent are there.

My friend told me yesterday that because she and her fiance are not yet married, they have to go to a social worker to announce/admit the paternity. Until then the baby has her last name and I guess legally he's not the father? They've been together for forever, have a house together, are engaged and have a life together but that's not enough. I laughed. Told her they're treated as badly as a lesbian couple. I mean, obviously it's not the same as what I'd have to go through, but seriously? He was there when his son was born, couldn't he just announce his intent to be a father?

You know what does make a father int he eyes of the law? A marriage! And since marriage still is just between a man and a woman in Finland, I'm talking about fathers here. Had we a marriage that didn't need gender, I'd talk about parents. If a child is born in a marriage, even if the husband was not the biological father, his name will be on the birth certificate until they go and change it. Bureaucracy!

A lot of legal protection for children comes from their parents being married. I think this example just makes it so much more clearer why we need to fight for our rights. For my kids one day to be recognized as a child of their parents, legally, without any unnecessary bureaucratic hoops involved.

There are millions of kids around the world without parents, with single parents (when the other one left or wasn't around to begin with) or with parents that don't love them, didn't want them, and treat them badly. In our society, it's more preferable to keep a kid with their parents even in less than desirable conditions, because of DNA, than to make it easier for loving same sex couples to have a kid that's legally recognized as their own. I don't get it. I really don't.

A couple I knew in USA adopted 2 kids few months back after going through for what I can only imagine was a lot of legal hoops, money, bureaucracy and other crazy things. They were suffering from infertility and then became foster parents. Eventually they were able to adopt the kids in their care. If procreation is the only reason to be married, shouldn't they be denied the right to be married? Or if the infertility is found out after tying the knot, can they stay married? No one who meets them can't deny the love and commitment they have for each other, and I know those kids are super lucky to have them as their parents. DNA shouldn't play a part in it.

Love's what matters. Why can't people see it?

And even though I managed to make this post about my rights once again, it really is about my indignation over the way my friend is treated.

Outrageous!

I read this article and was instantaneously filled with righteous anger. Where is Forssa Pride on this list, huh? Forssa Pride should be like the first Pride fest you ever go to! Like seriously! I demand recount! The writers of out traveler should come to Forssa Pride on the 26th and experience this extravaganza first hand!

In other news, my friend had a baby boy few weeks ago and I'm going to go sniff him out tomorrow! I'm not sure if I should wear Forssa Pride t-shirt or Manchester United jersey, because on one hand it's good to educate 'em young (really, never too early, although his mom celebrated Forssa Pride with us in October so he'll know what's up) but on the other hand, his parents are Barcelona fans, and I've already named him Leo Messi before he was born because of that, so it would be a good thing for him to see the better side of football too!

My short term goal of getting "fit" for Forssa Pride Party isn't really seeing much progress. I've gone to Body Pump classes about 3 times a week and I've increased the weights and I'm mindful of my core not giving out on me and fucking up my back, but when I measured myself a year ago (hip, waist, chest) and yesterday, I've not seen the decrease I hoped for. Fucking thyroid. I need to have my thyroid tested in few weeks to see what the levels are, and I'm otherwise feeling good, but the weight isn't going down. My weight fluctuates about 1,5kg from day to day, so it's hard to see any progress, but I'll be happy if I don't have to see the numbers 5 and 9 next to each other. I'm aiming for 55, I think my usual 52 is not within reach anymore. Or it will require measures not healthy for me so let's aim for something I might be able to reach. Once it's actually good enough weather outside and I can start running, it shouldn't be this hard. And I'm thinking about buying a bike if I can find one somewhere cheap and start riding it to work. You're probably thinking who is this person? I speak crazy, I know!

Forssa Pride Party 2.0 t-shirts now available

If you're interested in getting one of these masterpieces, you can find them in here.

I designed one few weeks ago that only I have access to, the ones on sale are the round badge logo. Here's a picture of mine.

Too bad it's not exactly a t-shirt weather n Finland with all the snow...

Song of the day

Recently I've been listening to Maroon 5 and Justin Timberlake's latest CD's and where as Maroon 5's whole album clicked right away, I had to give it some time for JT's music to open up to me. I got Maroon 5's overexposed because One more night is the new abs workout song in Body Pump and it's the best abs regime ever. If I ever get the motivation to actually do it at home, I now have the song.

JT I got because I kept seeing people talking about it on Twitter and his last album hundreds of years ago was really good. I mean, it's JT. When I listen to it the first time I was like this all sounds the same. It's sounds like 4 minutes featuring Madonna...Nothing was standing out. But once I kept playing it in the background it started to speak to me. JT is a genius, plain and simple. So, for the song of the day, enjoy JT's mirrors

Jewelry étiquette

So what's the deal with jewelry from your ex? I mean obviously rings are a big no no, because there's a special societal meaning behind rings, but what about other stuff? I don't own a lot of jewelry and I'm one of those people that if I have to put something on and take it off a lot of times a day, sooner or later I will stop putting it on at all. And I don't really care about jewelry all that much, but I like to have a necklace and earrings on, and sometimes I wear a ring. But I ware the same thing, I don't change often.

For my 28th birthday my ex got me a necklace with a heart pendant, which I love. It's small, it's simple and I wore it for every day for about 4 years straight. At some point it did mean that we loved each other. After the break up, and especially lately, I've felt weird wearing it. If I wear it, it doesn't give out any secret meaning of me wanting her back, does it? Because I like it, and I'd like to wear it, but when I start dating I don't want her to think I'm stuck on the ex. 

I also have another necklace she gave me, with a cat pendant. I actually had to think about when and where I got it from, and it definitely does not spell love. Except my love for cats. But it still is from her. And the earrings she gave me are the nicest I've got and I wore them for the longest time as well. I guess it's not a problem now, but what about later? I really don't wanna go jewelry shopping, it's such a hassle.

Help?

Mixed feelings

So according to some trashy magazine and half of Tumblr and twitter, one half of the actresses playing my favorite lesbian (broken up) couple on TV is pregnant. Great news for her and her boyfriend.

But what about us? What about me, huh? Why does this ALWAYS happen to my favorite lesbian couples? Why? The show has sucked for awhile and they made them broke up for no real reason ( I do NOT consider long distance a valid reason) and the fans have asked and begged and prayed for them to get back together and now it looks like it might never happen. I divorced the show a few weeks back because it just wasn't going the way I wanted but damn, this is depressing. It would be so much better for my mental health for TV shows not to have any lesbian characters/couples. I get attached and then they get fucked up. I mean Xena and Gabrielle never made it. Bette cheated on Tina and even though they got back together and lived happily ever after, we never knew who killed Jenny. But I'm able to enjoy Grey's Anatomy these days as just entertainment as opposed to being a representative of lesbian love and something to aspire for since I got over my Callie and Arizona shipping. I'm not sure if I'm able to do this with Glee,  enjoy it as just a show among others, just because the quality of the show has gone down a LOT during this season.

Maybe I'll just stick with crime dramas with no relationship aspects so I won't get attached?

Is there a support group for this? I do know that my existential crisis over a fictional TV couple(s) is ridiculous. I'll mourn this today and be happy for HeMo tomorrow. And we don't even know how this will affect them, but I have a feeling it's done now.

Le sigh.