38 gigs of pictures

So I went and bought a new computer back in October. Another Mac of course, but since I have my iPad I haven't really gotten around to play with this one (writing this post from my computer). I've moved my music and pictures and docs but haven't really organized them or anything yet. Then yesterday I decided to play with it. Stumbled upon iPhoto and voila! thousands and thousands of face recognitions later I'm in a situation where basically every face that I knew the name of, is named.

Now ever since I got my first digital camera I've been, how should I say this, click happy. It doesn't matter if the picture was good or not, the memory card could hold them all. Which is why I have 38 Gt's of pictures. While in USA, I was usually the designated photographer, so I have pictures from all kinds of family functions, games we attended to, the cats, Carly, x-mas, apartments, random street views etc. And since I've been back to Finland and have had the cats, I think I have at least 10 gigs of pictures of Dunkin Donuts and Brooklyn.

According to iPhoto, I have 9813 pictures. Little excessive, dontcha think? I have 467 pictures of Carly, 454 pictures of T, 468 pictures of Sox and Bailey, 850 pictures from different Pride Parades (in the US), and 1919 pictures of BK and DD! oops! Needless to say, some of that is going bye bye.

iPhoto's a funny little app. For instance, it asked if DD's and BK's mama cat was perhaps Heidi? It suggested female pictures to be male, suggested that perhaps a picture of Jane Lynch was Candice and sometimes didn't recognize the same picture as someone I had just identified with.

There are pictures from all kinds of family functions and T's got a huge family with all the extended members as well. And I've met some of them several times but am having trouble recalling their names. SO when some of them started jumping out frequently, I decided to name them. Or maybe rename them? I don't know. I have this feeling that this one cousin of Judy's is Bob, or maybe he's the husband of her cousin, but whatever, he's Bob now. Cannot for the life of me remember the wires name but whatever. TRied to recall cousin Erin's brothers name for the longest time as well and finally did. His mug has a name now too.

Now J&J's wedding...was kinda click happy that day so there's a LOT of pictures, both have BIG families and the wedding party was huge. I don't think I've ever been formally introduced to half of the bride's maids, so I was thinking I could just name them as Hot bride's maid #1, #2...? Same with the dudes.

The only thing I don't like about this is that it doesn't recognize cat faces. Like what the fuck? It would be so nice to name all 4 of my cats in a way that whenever I just wanted to remember Sox and Bailey, I could just click the file with their names and the pictures would be there.

Oh yeah, let's be real, it's not 38 gigs of pictures, I have a ton of video there as well. My little furry terrorists can be really entertaining. If I can get down to about 25 gigs, I'd be happy.

In case this is the last post of the year, which it very well might be...hope you have a happier 2013.

Total b.s.

So other than the spider bite or whatever it was that screwed up my foot back in 2008 and the usual illnesses kids go through, I've always been really healthy. No surgeries, broken bones, hospital stays etc. So this having-a-chronic-disease-business is total bullshit! Other than the symptoms I exhibited back in last winter and spring, possibly longer (weight gain, loss of appetite, tiredness, no energy), which could have been explained with a lot of other reasons, you can't really tell that I have a chronic disease. The only reason I remember I have it is because I take the medication every morning.

I've never had to think about whether I can take meds or mix them (for purely medicinal reasons) together, so now even with like nasal sprays I have to read the labels and see what it says about hypothyroidism. Have a stuffy nose? Spray Vick's in your nose! Nope, can't do that anymore, says on the bottle "consult with your doctor if you have any of the following diseases". Fuck! Would be nice if the warning would list the possible side effects or dangers. Does it decrease the effect my meds have? Does it cause me to have a heart attack? Will I have a seizure? Will I have problems conceiving? What? Please tell me so I don't worry about possible death when I accidentally use the spray.

In a perfect segue we can move on to Dunkin Donuts and her upset stomach. She's been having a diarrhea for the past few days and has puked a couple of times. If this continues still tomorrow I'll have to take her to the vet. She's been pretty good about me cleaning her butt but it's not fun. I've been trying to figure out if she's eating something she's not supposed to, like last week she was pulling the wall paper and eating it but I can't see anything like that happening, and I've been really good about hiding any small or sharp object and other than their food she doesn't have access to anything, so I don't understand where she's getting this. And Brooklyn is totally fine.

It's funny how quickly you learn to detect the small behavioral changes in your pets. With DD the way she walks and sits on the carpet tells me she's about to drag her butt on it, which obviously means she has a dirty butt. And she goes to corners to clean herself. My poor baby. Based on this behavior it can't be urinary track infection, because when Sox had it she was straining in a corner. DD is doing her business in the litter box and doesn't seem to go more than usual.

Anyway, I thought I'd share. Next week is the beginning of our LGB support group! Can't wait.

Song of the Day

It's been awhile.  Time for some great music.

Have a great weekend!

A love letter

I'm so proud. So. Proud.

A little over a year ago I was thinking "here goes the Forssa Pride Parade" every time I walked outside in Forssa.

This past May I lost my "Only lesbian in the village" status when I met Noora. On that faithful July evening when we came up with the idea of Forssa Pride Party, we had no idea if we could secure a location for it, let alone if people would show up. Now, a week removed from it, I am so proud to say it was a total success. Beyond my wildest expectation. You never know with these things, based on how many people liked the Facebook page (72), and how many said they were going to come (42), I was hoping it would be more than just me, Noora and my friends. But Never in my wildest dreams would I have expected 184 people to be there. Never. That little crazy idea me and Noora had, moved 182 other people. And not just from Forssa, or the neighboring towns, No. They came from Rauma, Turku, Tampere and Helsinki. Way over 100km away. To experience something different. To support a little town event. To meet new people.

I feel blessed, and that's not a word I usually use, because I associate it with religion, and we all know how I feel about religion. But I truly feel blessed right now. Everybody we asked for help or for advice or to do something for our event said yes. Eino made a fabulous poster and when I asked if he could adapt it for badge format, he did it. When I asked Pirkanmaan Seta for the badge machine, not only did they tell me where to get it, they promised to pay for the badges, got it for me and made the badges. They even tried to organize a bus transportation from Tampere and back. My friends, even though they probably thought I was crazy, promised to show up and support me. I gave interviews to 2 local news papers/magazines and gave on to a regional radio. And on Friday people came to shake my hand and thanking me for organizing the party. I met so many new people that I don't even remember them all. Got some new friends. And all the feedback we've gotten, whether before or after the party, has been nothing but positive. People had fun and are ready to come again. And the owners said they'd be open to it. So it looks like this might turn into a bi-annual or maybe trice-a-year event. How cool is that?

And it's not just the party. I was approach about starting a support group for lgb people in Forssa. We had a meeting about it yesterday and in 3 weeks time we'll have the first meeting. And I'm leading it. How crazy is that? Me, leading a group? I hate public speaking, I hate having all eyes on me, and here I am about to lead a support group. It's awesome, and crazy and wonderful and I really don't know which way to turn right now.

So thank you for everyone who had a part in making the first (of many) Forssa Pride Party a success. I really really appreciate each and every one of you for your support and participation and hope to see you at the next party, if not at the meetings.

And here I thought I was special

So it turns out Forssa is some kind of weird statistical anomaly. Yesterday I met yet another woman living in Forssa who belongs to the "I am/was dating an american" club. They should probably look into expanding the little air field in Forssa, because there obviously needs to be an air bridge between Forssa and east coast, USA.

One of these days we're all gonna get together, form a support group, make T-shirts and come up with a slogan. After Forssa Pride Party is over and done, maybe I'll look into organizing the "widows of an american" party.

Feeling guilty

Why is it that even though I have been super productive today, in kinda unproductive way, I feel guilty for hanging out in my bedroom? I have done Pride Party related things, took a walk, went to the grocery store and in general was out of the apartment for at least few hours today.

I bought cables to connect my computer to my TV few days ago so that I could watch all my shows from a slightly larger screen and lay back in bed. I've spent more time in my bedroom now than I have since the great depression of early 2011 when I laid in bed in my PJ's for days without going outside or changing watching youtube clips of lesbian couples and crying my eyes out. I guess now I associate laying in bed with a low point in my life and feel guilty doing it. I have a job that I am very good at, the 2 terrorists to keep me company and sane/insane, depending on your point of view, money to go places and do things, friends to listen to me ramble on and most importantly, a purpose. So I should be able to take it easy without feeling guilty, right? Next week is going to be so hectic, with badge-making on Monday night, public presentations in the evening on Tuesday and Thursday and 2 board meetings so I'm allowed to enjoy myself while I can.

I also feel guilty when after coming home from work I change into my PJ's. Like that implies that I won't be going outside again and especially NOT going to the gym. See, the gym is still making me feel guilty even though I haven't been for a while and didn't get my groove on with it. What's up with that? And now that I have the money and resources to go, I still don't feel like it. I'll take that 6-pack though, thank you very much, with a side of low(er) body fat. Keep the cellulite!

The reason I'm feeling guilty? I bought season 1 DVD's of Glee, Grey's anatomy and Ally McBeal today. Happy Birthday to me! You know what that means? Lounging in my bed for countless hours!

Pride Party feelings

Now that fall is upon us and the days are getting shorter and it's constantly raining, there's a song that for some reason just brings me back to this summer. I associate it with pride parties. It might have been playing at the women's party in Helsinki or at leimarit or pride party in Tampere, don't remember but I just get this peaceful, right-at-home-feeling when I listen to this song. And it will be played at Forssa Pride pre-party.  Just close your eyes and listen to the beautiful voice of Finland's favorite hollywood son-in-law.

Flying squirrels and such

I know I've been focusing on the Forssa Pride Party a lot lately and really, why not? It's awesome and one of a kind and bringing out the best in people. It's totally who you know and asking for help. The gay community is coming together.

I'm not writing about FPP right now though. I realized that I've neglected to post about my kittens. I guess they're not kittens anymore though. They are turning 14 months in 9 days. So adults who just look like kittens. They both weigh about 8,8lbs, 4kg. Somehow I thought they'd be bigger by now. But they are happy and healthy and not at all over weight so it's all good in the hood. Right now they are taking a little afternoon nap. They were outside in the balcony for about an hour in the morning. It's getting rainier and colder outside so the hour long outings in the balcony will come to an end soon. Or I'll have to dress up. I will take Brooklyn outside to play in the snow when it comes, I'm sure he'd like that.

But anyway, I uploaded 2 video's of them on Youtube. For the past 3 nights me and Dunking Donuts have played fetch the bottle cap before bedtime. I'm laying in bed and throw the cap to DD and she goes and gets it. In this video Brooklyn is also going after it while DD watches but when he doesn't come back with it, DD goes and gets it herself. "Don't let a man do what a woman can do better herself", or something like that DD's thinking there.

This unfortunately is quite dark but you can see DD though.

I've mentioned how Brooklyn thinks he's a part cat, part dog and part flying squirrel. Well, here's a video to prove the squirrel part. Brooklyn doesn't let things like heights to come between him and his destination. If there's nothing to climb on, he'll fly...or jump. I think he has a little bit of an engineer inside of him. Takes after his mama. So proud of him!

Interview

So, to promote the Forssa Pride Party I did an interview with a local independent magazine. That was published today. It's obviously in Finnish but here's the link anyway. My picture is also on page 5.
http://seutusanomat.netpaper.fi/30578

I gotta say I'm little nervous about going to work tomorrow. I have been as open about this as I can without actually saying anything with my rainbow bracelets and tattoos but so far no one at work hasn't said anything. I think that will change tomorrow. Let's see how many conversations suddenly ends when I walk into a room. Both of my bosses know and I told the head of our department that it was happening so he knows. And I guess I need to keep my eyes open when I'm in public to see if anyone has any reactions. Guess it's too late to take it back now, huh?

Shit you should have let go years ago

(Once in a while I'm able to produce a post about something other than Forssa Pride Party. This is one of the few until the date of the party.)

I think a "Thank You" is in order. I'm not sure if I've done this before and I'm too lazy to go back in time so if this something I've done before, I apologize.

My parents sold their house of 24 years and it needs to be empty by the end of this month. We had 2 HUGE attics and a basement. Over the years a LOT of stuff was stored there. It's like an episode of  hoarders there! Stuff from years ago that they thought they'd maybe need but never did. Broken toys, clothes, boxes, furniture...After seeing just how much crap was there I was thinking how lucky I was that T (and the airline regulations about number of bags a passenger can bring and their sizes) made me throw away everything that wasn't strictly necessary when we broke up. I've collected all kinds of little nick nacks over the 2 years I've been back but had I brought over all the stuff I and we bought while we lived together I'd be swimming in stuff. So thanks for that favor! That stuff is in a landfill somewhere in USA instead of in Finland.

My fabulous gay life

I'm waiting for my cup of Dunkin Donuts to brew and then I'll get ready for my interview regarding Forssa Pride Party! YAY! Expect it to hit your household next week...except if you're not in the Forssa region...or don't speak Finnish.

(No cats were harmed during the making of my cup of coffee)

Forssa Pride on Facebook

I'm super giddy right now! It's hard to concentrate at work sometimes when I'm this excited about our Pride Party! And We've had so much positive feedback already and people defending our idea to have something like this is a small town. The Finnish gay community is coming together.

Check out below the links to our Facebook pages and like and share if you please!

Forssa Pride Party event page

Forssa Pride Party fan page

Forssa Pride Party poster has arrived!

How awesome is that???

https://www.facebook.com/events/443637209020224/

Forssa Pride Party 2012

I can finally said it's done! After two years of being back, two years of thinking about how to get in touch with the gay community in Forssa, 2 years of trying to make friends and trying to "infiltrate" the gay community in Finland...I can proudly announce the first ever gay pride party @Bar 54 in Forssa!

Life's a fickle little thing. You never know where your decisions are gonna lead you. I've been thinking about my decisions a lot lately. Is it just a bad luck when your life sucks? When I was sending out job application after job application in USA and getting nowhere and my "deportation" date was getting closer and I felt more depressed and helpless each day...was that just bad luck or was it how everything was supposed to go?

When I think about all the great things I got to experience there, was that just luck, or is there a moment in my past where everything changed and took me to that particular path? Obviously TLW is a big part of all that, but I think I can pin point a moment from before that, that changed my path. Choosing to go to UK as an au pair.

Decisions.
I don't do well without direction in my life. I don't do well when others are in control of my destiny, of my life. No matter what I did, no one in USA was hiring me. I can safely say that at some point I gave up. I got depressed. What's the point of sending applications when nothing is going to come of them? When I came back and was under the impression that T would follow me, I perked up a little. Then the break up happened, and there was nothing I could do about it. I wasn't in control of my life. And nobody understood what I was going through. There's only so much that a married Finnish hetero people can understand about my cross-the-pond legal woes and heartache.

The decision to go get trained as a gay advocate was one of the best I've made since coming back to Finland. It brought new friends to my life, who have been so great, so great. And they are coming to the Pride Party. Just because I asked them to.

Internet. The decision to contact Noora has lead to this. One fine Friday night at the roof terrace we were using our gaydars for good, e.g. checking people out and talking about their gayness. Which lead to "wish we could be sure," which lead to "I wish we had a gay bar in Forssa," which lead to "What if we organized a party"...which lead to an impromptu advertisement pitch to the owner of the bar. And here we are. He said yes. He gave us 3 days to choose from. And we chose October 19th, 2012. We have a place, a date, a person creating a poster for the event, a Facebook page for the event, and a facebook event created for the event. We also have me coming out PUBLICLY in a magazine to promote the party.

Go to facebook.com/ForssaPride and share and like it, please!

Recap

It's been way too long since my last post and I have so much to write about but I just haven't gotten the stories out of me. If it was possible to record my blog and either some app writing it into words or a person doing it for me, I'm sure there would have been plenty posts between now and the last one.

• Job is still awesome. 2 projects finished in April, one new started in June so I now have 4 all together to manage. We have our first public event, well, MY first public event to introduce plans to public on Thursday...I'm not nervous...yet!
• Helsinki Pride was awesome. I had a great time with Heidi and Ella but sadly my old body can't handle 3 nights in a row in a bar drinking. 
• Tampere Pride was great also, with the same crew. The Parades here are different though, they are much more political and not about really enjoying and having fun like NYC Pride. 
• I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism which explains the constant tiredness, no appetite and my non-pregnancy pregnancy buddha! I really don't eat a lot but my weight keeps increasing. I mean there's something seriously wrong when after a body pump class I don't feel like eating a burger or anything greasy, which was normal for me back in the day. I didn't eat them, just craved them. I have medication but I don't think it's working just yet. Been on it for 2 months now.
• All the 13 lbs I've gained have gone to my belly. Why couldn't it have stayed north just a bit? 
• It's probably illegal in at least 100 countries to have cats as cute as mine! Like they are seriously the most adorable cats in the world. I'd put up pictures but I'm too lazy. I just downloaded almost 400 pictures and videos from my iPad to my computer but don't feel like going through them just now. One of these days I'll make a whole post about them.
• The furry babies turned 1 last Thursday! I wanted to have party hats and put a candle on their food but couldn't find party hats small enough to fit their heads. 
• Finnish summer this year has been anything but hot and sunny. Nothing like the past 2 summers. Not a huge deal for me since I only had 2 days for vacation but probably not fun for those who had whole 4 weeks in July.
• Folks finally found a buyer for their house. It's been a year...
• There should be some pretty exciting news coming up if not this week then next. I have something great planned if only the venue clears.

Stay tuned!

What are the chances?

What are the chances that in a town of 18000, with a thriving gay community (yeah, right) two 30 something year old lesbians who knew nothing about each other have american exes?


What are the chances?

Charging batteries

I went to bed at 7:30am this morning. I slept maybe 3 hours and I still feel like my batteries were charged. Wanna know why? I spent the weekend in Helsinki and went to a gay bar with a friend. I feel slightly hangover but no nausea or a headache. I can't remember the last time I went to bed at 7:30am. Is it Pride week yet?

And I even skipped the Finland bronze medal game today. Who knew?

Bipolar gay news day

I woke up this morning to the news that Amendment 1 had passed in North Carolina defining marriage as between a man and a woman and banning civil unions as well in that state.

The this evening I get the pleasant surprise of reading that the President of the United States, Barack Obama, who previously has said that marriage is between a man and a woman came around and said he now supports full marriage equality!

That is awesome and for a news day, especially a gay news day, so bipolar.

But as happy as I am about Obama changing his mind, I cannot help but think of this as a political move. The presidential candidates now are as far apart on civil rights issues as they possibly can. Romney the ultra conservative mormon, and Obama supporting marriage equality. I just find the timing curious.

Interviews

Within few months time I went from looking for interviews to being the one doing the interviewing. How crazy is that? Life works in mysterious ways! And the shit storms end eventually. I'd like to offer more profound knowledge and words of wisdom but i'm gonna sound too out of this world (and not me), so I'll end it here.

Pay Day

Pay day is probably the happiest day of the month. It certainly is my favorite right now. The days following pay day can be dangerous. I may or may not have bought some new stuff, all needed I might add, to the cats, or for them. Was able to stay under 100 though...

Grocery store was bad too. Had a list that would have come up to about 20 euros...went just a tad bit overboard. But all of the things I came home with were on my endless list of things to get so basically I am just making that list smaller.  I don't necessarily need to get ALL of them right away but it makes me happy. I haven't been able to get myself anything for the past 2 years so this is much needed retail therapy to get myself over the poorer times.

I was also able to reduce my debt to R2. He lent me the money to fly to Finland 2 years ago when I had to bring my broke ass home and he's been so patient with it. Good times!

Happy Labor day!

Open letter to the bicycle thief/thieves of Forssa


First of all...FUCK YOU!

Second of all...How dumb are you?

Third of all...SERIOUSLY?!?

So my bike got stolen today for the second time this year. The bike that has no chains, has no breaks and has no gears. It was stolen for the first time few months ago and was found few weeks ago. I even made an appointment to get it fixed. Thankfully I didn't spend that 250 euros yet.

Ybi went to the grocery store for an hour this morning and when he came back the bike was gone. It was chained to the bike rack that's on his yard. Last time it wasn't even locked but seriously, how dumb do you have to be to steal a bike that you can't ride? Like seriously? If I was to steal a bike, I'd make sure it works! And when I realize it doesn't, I'd ditch it. The bike was gone for few months last time and then returned to an alley near where it was stolen from. It took them weeks to realize that it wasn't working, nor would it work without it being fixed.

If you see this bike "hanging around" in a street corner or at somebody's yard, please notify me.

In other news, Brooklyn caught a bigger prey than ever before. He's such a smart little hunter

Anyway, hope you have a great labor day! Another paid holiday!

Do I see what I want to see or what is really there?

This being-the-only-lesbian-in-the-village business is hard (work). I don't know any other L/G/B people in Forssa, I see them but I don't know them. Once I opened my eyes and started looking, yes, they do in fact exist in this town. Now, though, I'm not sure if what I see is reality or if what I see is what I want to see. Does that make any sense?

Yesterday was once again "wear rain boots to work" day. A group of first year sustainable development students from HAMK came to Tammela to see different projects we've done during the years and I was their tour guide. Everyone knows that I'm an amazing public speaker so I wasn't worried at all... Anyway, we went to 4 different locations and I told them about 2 of them. There was about 15 of them and I am about 85% sure there was a lesbian couple in the group. And if they weren't a couple they definitely had feelings for each other. Always together, kind of leaning towards each other. Aww, young love.

Resolution...or a promise?

I went to buy a ridiculously heavy cat litter yesterday and as I was paying for it they handed me a news letter called "cat post". I was browsing through it and on the last page there was an ad for "Litter kwitter", a system to teach your kitty to do their business in the toilet bowl. I know I have mentioned this when I first brought the kittens home, Brooklyn especially would be a prime candidate to learn and learn quickly and DD could imitate him. So, I, just now, made a promise to myself that by the time they turn 1, on August 9th 2012, they will be toilet trained. I will post a video as a proof of the intelligence of my kittens.

6

My big super gay easter with a dash of bi on top

There really is nothing better than government sanctioned 4 day easter holiday with an extra day off to get your gay on! 4 day easter holiday when unemployed is no way different from 2 day weekend, but when you don't have to go to work but still get paid...priceless!

Me and my mom went to a big flee market in Salo on Saturday followed by one in Forssa. I saw my friend Marita there and we made plans to go out on Saturday night. After few drinks, card games and catching up I felt like going clubbing so I texted Arttu to see where they were going and joined his posse. I spent my night spotting the gays in the club. Came up with 2 confirmed bi's and few suspected gays. And few clearly confused, but it's not my place to judge. I spent my Sunday in bed getting over the hangover. I'm a light weight, I can't lie!

On Monday I went to Tampere to an international gay group meeting. They had decided to do some "crafts", which turned out to be crocheting (virkkaus). There was 6 gay boys and me...really, who knew that the terminology for it was so dirty? It was all about tight holes and pushing through and loosening up.

Then I took Tuesday off to be a human book in the human library at my old high school. (And I'm happy to have the official english word for it too.) It was once again great experience and I was so glad to realize that all of the 12 people who "borrowed" me, none thought that being gay was anything special. They told me there is at least 2 gay boys and 1 lesbian at the school and no one thinks it's something that should get you bullied for. All of them know and have gay people in their lives so it's part of the environment they are growing up in. I wish I had that when growing up. But it was very therapeutic to sort of come out in high school, even if it was 13 years after I matriculated from that place!

It's also great to speak with the other human books and squash some of my own prejudice. You learn so much from the others and listening to them I always appreciate how easy my coming out was and the relative easiness of my life in general. And I also learned that not all porn stars are beautiful women with big boobs. Sometimes they are in their 40's, have blond hair to their shoulders, look like life has treated them harshly, wearing big black hoodies and camo pants. And also look like the spitting image of Tony Halme!

Also, I was not the only lesbian in attendance!

Stroke my ego

Sigh. First month of my new job is behind me and I am loving it. I think I found my "field". There are days when I can hardly find the time to go eat and I feel like I go to work at 8am and blink once and it's time to go home. I'm definitely not bored! I'm slowly getting to know my co-workers at the technical department and I love the fact that we have our coffee breaks together. There's a sense of unity. Even among the women. I guess we all have such a different job descriptions that there's no need to step on anyone's toes. Or stab anybody in the back. Not like in that one place I worked at...

Challenges and learning. Check. And validation. I cannot tell how good it feels to be acknowledged for the job you do. And feel like you accomplish things during the day. Not just sitting on the sofa playing games all day long or pretending to look for jobs. I'm researching things I never thought I would look into, I'm being treated as a professional and an expert in things I have no place being called an expert. And people are listening to me. Let's not forget the occasional middle aged farmers I'm dealing with who have no regards to young, small and female project coordinator, but being taken seriously by my co-workers does plenty to smooth my feathers.

Few weeks ago I went to speak at a local school's PTA meeting in regards to one of the projects I'm coordinating. The project is so far from my expertise or what I've studied that we're not even on the same  planet but they treated me like I knew everything or that building pedestrian and bikeways was what I do. Well, I guess it is now...sort of. I, personally, won't build anything...just coordinate. For building and designing there will be more intelligent people at work! But as I was driving home from the meeting I just couldn't stop smiling. After the past 3 years, after all the rejection letter, all the non-returned phone calls and e-mails, after being made feel like a 3rd class citizen...I'm reveling in this feeling. I also had my first payday on Friday...what a feeling!

I haven't opened my TV to watch any series regularly since being back to Finland, but after I got a TV guide few weeks ago and there was an article about the show "Revenge" I had to watch it. So far the premises is great but one thing making me watch it is the fact that once upon a time I applied to be the environmental coordinator of the township of Southampton and even got a call back! LOL! Nothing came of it, after I tried to call them back they never returned my calls, but wouldn't it had been like a match made in heaven: me and the rich and famous in the Hamptons? I can just see myself in my "couture" mingling with the folks there. That could have been a reality show!

I had to by rain boots this weekend. One of my projects is going to the woods tomorrow! Our consultant is showing us what he's come up with as far as measures to stop and slow water movements from one lake to another and to prevent flooding in the lower lakes and just in time winter came back! Last week was so pretty and getting warm and sunny. This wee started with snow and traffic chaos...And the white ground is gonna be a problem when trying to see what goes where. But I have hiking boots, rain boots, woolly socks, long johns, rain pants and coat, winter coat, fleece, hat, baseball cap, mittens etc packed so I'm ready!

I took the cats outside yesterday. Just as I was leaving it started snowing. Poor DD, she's not usually a lap cat but yesterday when we were outside she couldn't get to my lap fast enough and tried to burrow her way inside my fleece. And Brooklyn looked exceptionally fluffy. I have pictures. They probably hate the carrying box by now...it's either the Vet or going outside in the snowy weather. I might be taking them outside this Friday as well if weather permits. Going for Easter lunch at my mom's and Ybi said he'd change summer tires to the car and I might take the cats with me and they can hang out with him. They were pathetic yesterday though...hiding behind things. By the summer they'll be pro's at visiting people and places!

More soon(ish)!

I don't know how to relax

As I was walking to the grocery store today I felt weird. For the past 3 years I haven't really been able to fully enjoy the weekends and supposed relaxation as there has always been something to worry about. Finding a job so I wouldn't be kicked out of US. Finding a job to have a job. Finding a job to have money. Finding a job to have a resemblance of a life. There was always job searching to be done, resumes to tweak, applications to write. Now that I could just relax and fully enjoy the possibility of doing nothing, or to enjoy the things I like to do, like catching up on my shows, or reading, I can't fully commit. Weird! i feel like there's something I should be doing or worrying about.

The job has been great! I am coordinating 3 active projects and 2 that have a month before they are finished. There are couple of projects in the works which are just waiting for a funding and if granted will start soon. I have been super busy and really thrown in the middle of some tricky and time sensitive situation but it's exactly what I wanted from a job; challenges and learning something new every day. I feel like I'm doing a pretty good job and I have learned to put aside my feeling of not wanting to sound stupid and ask the stupid questions and admit when I'm not following. No one has laughed at me yet. My co-workers are great, my department is great and everyone at the town hall has been really helpful. And on Monday I'm going to the weekly meeting of the department heads and Mayor to introduce myself and talk about what's going on with the projects.

So things are finally looking up. The bout of bad karma/luck that hindered me for few years seems to have passed. It's a new beginning, new year and all that jazz. Oh, and I'm coming out at my high school! Another Alive Library being organized in Forssa in April at my old high school and the students were asked to name books they'd like to borrow and lesbian was requested. I was contacted and after asking a day off from work I said yes. I might be over thinking my importance but like I've said before, I could have benefited from seeing a real life lesbian when I was that age. Hopefully, maybe, my being there will help someone. And if not, I still get to hang out with some cool people.

International women's day

Today's one of those days when lesbian etiquette would come in handy. As someone who appreciates women, am I also supposed to offer roses and chocolates etc to women? Am I supposed to still expect men to wish me happy women's day? Or is it just a day, like any other day, when you just go on being the fabulous woman you are? And then what if you are in a relationship? If you do something for your woman and she does something for you, it kind of turns into a Valentine's day, doesn't it? And if you are in a lesbian relationship, isn't every day really a women's day? And really, no matter gay, straight or questioning, isn't every day really a woman's day anyway?

Now that I think about it, this day was probably designed to make sure men would appreciate the wonderful women they have in their lives at least once a year. So...Happy international women's day ya'll!

February 29th

This day only comes along once in every 4 years and if you follow traditions, it's the only day when women proposing is acceptable. So in light of the day...Will you marry me?

Being a lesbian/in a lesbian relationship, this can be exceptionally tricky. What if you want to propose to your girlfriend? Do you go against the grain and propose when you're ready or do you wait for this day to come around? And what if you wait the 4 years and she says no?

And if she says no, and you are not a dress wearing lesbian, nor do you know how to make a dress, can you request something else, other than fabric for a new dress? Since times have changed, can you maybe expect an iPad or GPS, or some other technology for the rejection?

Someone needs to write an etiquette book for lesbians regarding this issue!

Kitten outing

I took the kittens outside to snow today. It was a sunny day and it was either getting the 3rd cat out of the sheets (getting the fur out of them before washing them) or taking the kittens outside and introducing them to snow and since cleaning is really not high on my favorite things to do, I decided that a little drive and walk was in order.

Getting the cats to the carrier was a little more difficult than usual since now DD especially associates the carrier with vet appointments but once I got them into it it was fine. Ybi helped me get them outside and he took Brooklyn's leash and I took DD's, since DD is a bit more shy than BK.



After we got back inside DD wanted to hide and this was her solution

Dunkin Donuts' super powers

Either the vaccination Dunkin Donuts received today was spiked with some pretty powerful stuff or she was implanted with some sort of kitten super power last week during her surgery because...

This was Dunkin Donuts last week after she woke up from her surgery



And this was her today



Seriously, mama's not happy! She broke one of my kitty figurines but more importantly, she can now get up all the way up high and I'm not sure how she'll get down! Plus now I have to move my breakables to another place! I can't have any nick nacks on display because soon they'll all be broken!

Way to over achieve DD!

Kittens and smells

Dunkin Donuts and Brooklyn don't like catnip. They can't even smell it, to my eternal disappointment. They don't react to it at all. But do you know what they do react to? My lotions and perfumes! To ALL of my good smelling lotions and perfumes. To the point where I can't even per them because they run the other way! This is Dunkin Donuts' "I don't like that smell"-face

She squints her eyes and backs away. Her "I smell food"-face is kind of similar but instead of backing away she follows me. Brooklyn doesn't really have this strong of a facial reactions so I don't have pictures of him doing this. I do, however, have pictures of him looking all pathetic and kitten-ly from Thursday night when he was nodding off next to the radiator.

And he usually looks so big and majestic!

The whole thing was so much more traumatic for me than it was for them. I'm still shaking when thinking about it. They are jumping as high up in the book shelf as they were before hand and running around in the apartment like there's no tomorrow. Thankfully that was it for surgeries. We're done now. And I don't have to worry about kittens. Phew!

Mug shots

Dunkin Donuts

 Sox

Sisterly semblance when drugged up!

My week

a) Got a job.

b) Cats are being neutered tomorrow.

Story telling

You know when you're telling a story to someone and they try to guess what you're saying next and they guess completely wrong each time? I hate that.

Perspective

Wow! So I have been living in quite the bubble here. Like seriously, can you spell delusional? Remember that scale I bought to see how much DD and BK weigh? Well, they are doing good, at least by my standards. BK was 3,3kg today so he's growing like a healthy kitten. DD was sleeping at the time so I wasn't gonna disturb her.

I have gained 4kg (~10 lb.) since I've been back to Finland, so in 1,5 years. And I even know where it all has gone, I look at it every day. It's in my stomach. The life preserver around my mid section is hard to miss. But there is nothing, NOTHING, NOTHING like trying on your interview clothes to see just how much you've actually gained and SEEING it! Like wow...if I didn't know better I'd say I was preggers! Holy shit! That is some fugly ass bulge I have going on there. I think it's time to make those new years resolutions and add "loose weight, gain a 6-pack" to it!

I think I'm gonna have a snack of cheese puffs and for dessert I'll eat a chocolate pudding. And maybe have a beer to chase it down!

Hope you have a thinner 2012 than I do!

Life's little mysteries

Why is it that when I speak to people or write, I speak my local dialect but when I coo at my kittens it comes out as Finnish? I, for the life of me, cannot speak proper Finnish to people without sounding like an idiot. And I would sound even bigger an idiot if I started cooing at people in order to speak Finnish. I guess you can't have it all.

Yesterday I struck out 2/2. Pekka Haavisto did not win the presidential election to become the 12th President of Finland and Patriots lost to the Giants. Oddly enough I'm not too bumped out about either. It would be unbearable to be in NYC right now but other than that I can't muster the hatred for Giants. And yesterday as I was watching the Super Bowl and seeing all these emotional people cheering for and living for their favorite team  I thought that the only team evoking such a strong emotions on me is Leijonat, Finnish mens national hockey team. That makes me a proud Finn. No single team is that important to me in any sports.

Gays, elections and Super Bowl

We didn't get a gay president.That's ok, maybe next time. It was clear before the campaigning even started that Sauli Niinistö was going to be the new president and he dominated the polls as well as the first round so it wasn't a surprise. 30% of the eligible voters chose not to vote on second round making them unable to whine for the next 6 years. You don't use your civil right to vote? You don't get to complain! I am proud of the 37% of Finns who voted for Pekka Haavisto. Since not all of them are gay, there is a clear movement for more tolerable Finland and people can see beyond sexual orientation.

If you are looking for positive sides for this result, the future president's wife is my name sake so hopefully this will mean that people around the word will learn to pronounce my name properly. "Jenni" will never be the same again! Make sure they say your name correctly!!!

Now that the first election is over we can move on to the next exciting event of the day: Super Bowl!

Brooklyn and TJ (which one is which?) are ready for it and so am I! I am wearing one of my many Eagles jerseys and have compiled every Eagles merchandise I own into my living room. Which isn't many as some/most of them never found their way back to me. But since Eagles, despite their "dream teamyness" never made it this far, we are cheering for the Patriots. Which probably means they'll lose since all the teams I've cheered for in these play offs have lost. But I'd rather cheer for the losers than the Giants so there you go.

Enjoy the Super Bowl and I'll see ya on Tuesday! Will probably sleep through Monday.

What the hell?

So if you know me and have been to my place, you'd know that I'm not the most cleanest person. I don't have trash lying around or major dust bunnies ready to attack you or anything like that but my things have a tendency to not find their way back to where they belong and the dishes do pile up more often than not. But now that I have kittens who explore and chew and play with everything they can get their claws on, I've made an effort to keep my stuff where it belongs and I have even dusted more often. Twice in the past 2 weeks, if you can believe it! And yesterday I took the rugs out, I dusted and vacuumed, even moved the 5 ton couch to get underneath it so you'd think that this place is clean, right? I thought so. I mean it can obviously never be totally cat hair free and with 2 mid long haired kittens it's virtually impossible but I tried.  So why is it that Brooklyn's tail looks like this?

And I didn't use him to dust so there's no reason why his tail should be covered with dust, or dust-like particles!

Ever since I moved here I've wanted black sheets! I didn't have any under sheets that fit my bed so I had to buy some but they didn't have black ones then so I had to settle with other colors. Last week I went and got that black sheet and put them on. And boy are they great! But...it might not be the bestest of ideas to have black sheets when you have 2 black and white cats! Let's just say that after a week the sheets are less than black. But I still love them! The problem is, It's sometimes hard to spot DD from the black ground but thankfully she usually has her paws up!

You can spot Brooklyn easily though

Brooklyn's also a fan of sleeping under covers. 

 He will burrow himself by my feet and get cozy and warm.

It's dark and blurry but Dunkin Donuts has taken over over half the bed in width. And yes, that's how she sleeps sometimes. 

 Whereas BK likes to have covers, DD likes pillows. Middle of the bed between the pillows is her favorite place. The sheets have the fur to prove it!

I'm still not sleeping through the night but when I do have to kick them out it's usually closer to 6 than 4am. DD has learned to not bite me to show her affection and BK is not licking my face as often as he used to so we are definitely making progress. If I had to wake up early it would not be a problem as I have 2 living alarm clocks ready to wake me up before dawn. Now I wake up to Brooklyn positioning himself on or next to my chest and purring as loud as he can with the occasional licks for good measure. He has not learned what NO means so sometimes if it's early I get up, get outside the bedroom and have the cats follow me. When we're outside, I quickly come back inside and close the door on them. I dread the day when they realize what I'm doing and it will stop working on them. But until then... The good thing is, in these 3 months I have learned to not fully wake up when getting them out. I'm kind of sleep walking. If I awoke fully, I wouldn't be able to fall back to sleep and there's just no reason to be up at 6 or 7 am now is there?

Enjoy this beautiful winter day and bundle up! Forecast predicted -27 degrees Celsius for tomorrow few days ago. If that happens it'll be colder than the coldest from last winter in Forssa which was about -20-22 degrees C.

Oh yeah, almost forgot! Got my T-shirt for Pride in the mail today! YES! so excited! Thanks Candice!

Boy bands

Every single girl on this planet, whether gay or straight, has that one boy band that they crushed on when they were teenagers, whose songs bring all the teenage angst and love and hate and all those other feelings forth. For my generation (that just makes me sound old) depending on which continent you grew up in, it's between NKOTB and Take That, or other british boy bands. I think I was just few years or a year too young to really get on the NKOTB bandwagon but really LOVED Take That.

I was so crazy about Take That, that I called a friend who subscribed to Finnish teen magazine "Suosikki" and asked her if she would sell the Take That posters to me that were in one weeks/months magazine and when she said yes I left her on the phone while I rode my bicycle to her house about 20 minutes from mine. When I got there I asked her mom where she was and she said still on the phone waiting to hear from me. Oops! My room was plastered with Take That posters. I loved the music. Gary and Howard were my favorites. Was so sad when they broke up. No major feelings when they regrouped few years back.

Reason why I'm writing about this is because I have been listening to my iTunes and once in a while their songs pop up. And it's kind of, how should I say this? Not-worth-calling-your-friend-and-asking-her-to-sell-her-posters...It can still make me remember all those things I felt when I first started listening to them but now it's like if you were just coming out with these songs you'd never make it.

I never saw Take That in a concert but I did see Mark Owen in Swansea at "Party in the Park" while me and Laura were volunteering there in the summer of 2003.

We also saw Liberty X, Girls Aloud and another girl band whose name I can't remember and the pictures are all kind of blurry so I can't even try to recognize them.

Anyways, just thought I'd share. It was something that I have been thinking about for few weeks now. Also, went and voted for Pekka Haavisto for president today. Now we'll just wait till the 5th to hear the results. Let's make history again Finland!

This and that

I bought a scale today. I really wanted to see how much the kittens weigh because the Veterinarian didn't weigh them and Ybi's scale wasn't calibrated so those results were tentative. And it might be good for me and my life style stomach to know when to stop eating and maybe, maybe start exercising.

When I brought the kittens home I was given starter packages for them, sponsored by Science Plan cat food brand. They also included a little health booklets for both where you can follow their development, healthy weight etc. I'm sure you know that I think my kittens are kinda skinny, I mean I have been talking about it. They're kinda long and now that they are shedding some of their baby kitten fur, Brooklyn especially is looking really thin. DD has the advantage of long hair so she at least looks fluffy and since she's smaller than BK, with the extra fluff she looks stockier. More like the norm that I got used to with Sox and Bailey. Well, looks like I was totally wrong about their skinniness. According to the booklet male kittens 5,5 months old should be about 2,7kg on average. Brooklyn is 3kg. Females at this point should be about 2kg. DD is 2,7kg! She's so big that she's not even in the female chart anymore! And seriously, I check their forms everyday and they definitely do NOT have any extra fat anywhere! But, few of my friends who've seen them have said they think they'll be big cats so hopefully this is just because of that.

We are still on course to have the first openly gay president in Finland. He was able to come in second at the first round so for the next 2 weeks both of them will be running around all over Finland to make their case. Early voting starts tomorrow and I'm gonna go vote before or after my hair appointment tomorrow. Pekka Haavisto for President!

Presidential Election

Today is the first round of Finnish Presidential Election. When I turned 18 and was eligible to vote My mom told me to always vote for a woman because men will not represent the things that are important to me, as a woman. And I have. Until this election. There are 8 candidates, 6 men and 2 women. I will NEVER vote a christian democrat, even if the online "election machines" make me out to be one and Eva Biaudet was not "it" for me. My vote went for Pekka Haavisto and if he makes it to the second round my vote will go to him again.

I am now watching the election broadcast at MTV3 and they have already have a little mishap. They were interviewing Paavo Väyrynen with his wife and afterwards the hostess said that "behind every successful man is a wife or a woman". As she was saying this they had a screen with Pekka Haavisto waiting to be interviewed and as a gay man in a registered partnership I thought it was extremely heteronormative.

The final results are over an hour away and as of right now Pekka Haavisto is in 3rd place. A lot of urban votes are yet to be counted so this will hopefully change and he will move to second place and into the second round. The people speculating on TV are saying that many of the feminist votes are going to Pekka Haavisto instead of the 2 female candidates because of his sexuality and they feel that he's the best of the men. That's part of the reason why I am voting for him. Part is that he has international experience and I feel that he could represent Finland in a positive manner. President may not have a lot of power anymore but he/she is still the figurehead of this country and I would much rather see someone "hip" representing Finland than some grumpy old man.

But whatever happens, Finland has taken a huge step ahead in the equality department with an openly gay man being so successful in an election which is more about the person than a party. Go Pekka!

Dunkin Donuts playing fetch

I though the pretty face needed a post of her own. I uploaded both of the videos on youtube yesterday but for some reason the one with just DD took a way too long so I couldn't post it yesterday. But here it is now. Sorry about the quality but my camera sucks!

I would like to point out that even though she didn't exactly bring the balls back to ME, she did go after them and carried them back to my vicinity so that I didn't have to be the one to go get them in order for the play to continue. Which hasn't happened with DD before. Brooklyn brings the balls back to me if he's the one to catch them but if it was DD, he didn't bring them back. So now maybe the chances of the balls being returned to me have gone up slightly.

oh happy day!

My kittens are geniuses! There's no other way to describe them! And can you imagine how happy I am to discover that Dunkin Donuts is not just a pretty face! It might take her a little longer to learn these things but today, out of nowhere, she fetched the ball! 4 times in a row! And twice on camera! I'm downloading them on youtube as we speak! I'm so happy! I'm so proud!

Brooklyn and Dunkin Donuts fetch the ball

Walk down the memory lane with Emperor's fiancee

I was googling cat fur patterns and colors yesterday because I wanted to get a word to describe what type of cats I have and also what types Sox and Bailey were. Well Sox obviously is a tuxedo, same as Dunkin Donuts. Bailey is a tabby cat and now I have a confirmation for Brooklyn. According to wikipedia, the most accurate information site out there, he is, indeed, a "moo cat". Black and white cow pattern equals "moo cat". There you have it folks. As I was doing this I had to go to my files and look at the pictures of Sox and Bailey because I couldn't remember what they looked like exactly. It's a sad sad state we're in...can't even remember my poor babies anymore. But looking at those pictures I can now totally understand why I think Brooklyn and DD are too skinny. Sox and Bailey are big girls! I don't think I really understood their weight problems until now that I have DD and BK. And even though these 2 are just wee kittens and still growing, the difference is huge.

You know what else is sad? Adulthood! It's the stage in your life when you willingly do things you swore you'd NEVER do again when you were a kid. I have found myself having a bowl of oatmeal every night for I don't even remember how long. And as someone who spent 6 years in kindergarten eating breakfast there every morning, breakfast usually equalling oatmeal, I am totally disgusted with myself! Although the oatmeal they fed us was nothing like the flavored instant just-add-hot-water oatmeal I'm eating now but still. Oatmeal is oatmeal even if you fry it in butter. And back then you either just ate it as such or maybe added some sugar and a dollop of butter. No cinnamon, no apples, nothing. Plain oatmeal still tickles my gag-reflexes. Just like banana yogurt does and I used to eat it like crazy when I was a kid. It was the only flavor that didn't have fruit pieces in it. For some reason fruit pieces offended my sensibilities.

Wanna know what I drink with my oatmeal? A cup of TEA! Check out my profile on the upper right hand corner. What does it say? Something about being a coffee drinker and hating tea cuppers? Tea Party is giving tea drinkers a bad name. And for coffees sakes, I named my cat "Dunkin Donuts" after my favorite coffee chain! You can't get much further away from tea party/cuppers/drinkers. But, I do remember my friend Antti saying once upon a time that drinking tea was so gay. That was right before he himself started drinking it. And he's straight. So there seems to be a conflict of interest: on one hand there's the homophobic religious right of US political map who call themselves the tea party, which would just be so totally against everything I am or represent and on the other hand there's Antti, my straight friend saying drinking tea is gay. Should I listen to the people who hate me and who and what I am or my friend? Hmmmm...there's a problem if ever you encountered one! But I still maintain my coffee drinker status.

To go back to my tea drinking ways...The brand I drink is called "Emperor's fiancee". It's something that I drank at Janne's place when he was living next door at Linikkalankatu. It's also around the time when I had my first girl crush. Or obsession. potato-potato. And when I had the subsequental boy crush. When I projected my girl crush feelings to a boy so I wouldn't have to deal with the fact that I was totally crushing on a girl. Great survival mechanism. I was about 14 at the time. Time sure flies when you're gay. Or coming to terms with the fact that you're gay. As I came out at 24 so it only took me about 10 years to deal with it. Anyway, the taste and smell of the tea just brought all that back. So I thought I'd share. No reason for me to walk down memory lane by myself.

Have a blessed Tuesday! OYG, the tea is making me religious! Somebody come and take it away!!!

Till next time!

The perfect winter's day

Today is the first "real" winter's day of this winter and I feel like all is right in the world. You can't be sad, or depressed or gloomy in this weather. It's -12C/10F and the sun is shining. I just took the rugs outside, I'm enjoying my umpteenth cup of coffee of the morning and am about to vacuum. If I had a washing machine I would be doing laundry today and if I had food in the fridge I'd be cooking today. THIS is what perfect weather does to me. It motivates me. It makes me want to do things, finish things. Be productive. This is the weather we enjoyed the whole last winter. Snow, below freezing temperatures, sunshine. Perfect!

This is what you get when you "complain" about your winter weather and how pointless having your winter clothes are in Finland when there's no need for them. I should try to jinx these more often!

Let's hope more of days like these for this winter! Enjoy it while you can.

It's Swedish time again! YAY!

Naturally I would be the one to get the over-achieving kitten, right? And this time I'm not talking about Brooklyn. No, I'm talking about Dunkin Donuts and the fact that she just had to be in heat as soon as it's kittenly possible! The pamphlets said kittens start to be in heat between 4 and 6 months old...So whatcha know, DD just went right and in embraced it! But...if she's in heat NOW, it means that she can't be "with kittens", right? So me having to listen to this kitty cat concert and having to witness my babies in compromising positions and having to get up a 1000 times a day to go check what's up with her/them is worth is because we are not having baby kittens, right? I'm not gonna be a grandma, right? RIGHT?!?

I don't think Brooklyn's in heat yet, because he's not the one serenading nor is he marking his territory and he just looks kind of confused by what DD is doing and shaking her ass in his face but I think some of the pheromones are getting to him. He might not know exactly what or why he's doing it and I'm hoping there's no juice in his pistol but it does worry me. And we just went through this 2 weeks ago. I thought it should have been 3 weeks in between. But I will gladly listen to all of her concerts for the next month if it means she's not with kittens so we can get them neutered next month. February has never looked better as month!

I've come to the conclusion that cats are like gold fish. Their memory is reset every morning. Like when have I ever put their food in the trash can for them to eat? But still, every morning they insist on trying to get to the trash when I put the wrapping in there. And still, every morning they insist on checking what's gonna come out of the fridge when I open the door. And they both know which drawer is their food drawer.

Cats, I swear...

Illogical rationalization

Last Friday when I was walking home through the rain and slush from the grocery store with my backpack full of cat food I got it. I finally could understand the people who spend all their money on their pets, put them in diamond crusted collars and feed them more expensive foods than they themselves eat. As I don't have the means to give Brooklyn and Dunkin Donuts diamond crusted collars right now (nor would I ever do that no matter how many millions I was worth) I am just going to have to make sure they have enough food and toys and other equipment they need.

I didn't buy x-mas presents for anyone else except few toys for DD and BK and even those have not really been hits. I bought them these mouses that had catnip parcels in them and I think either the catnip had lost its mojo or my kittens don't react to catnip. The package also said that they could be used as activation toys, put treats in them and cats would try to get them. Well, as DD refuses to work for her food, it's kind of pointless. And BK chewed the tail from one of the mouses so I had to cut the tail from the other as well. What the hell kind of toys crumble like that? I of course immediately thought it will be dangerous for the kittens and their digestive systems to swallow plastic and this wasn't exactly my first scare thinking they ate something they weren't supposed to.

I gave the kittens the corks from plastic bottles and they have been the most treasured toys especially for DD. She can hunt them for hours! And she's very territorial of them. I've given them like 5 of them and then one day before x-mas I realized that I hadn't seen any of them for a while. I went through the whole apartment, all the nooks and crannies I could think of and nothing. I even went as far as feeling up the cats because I was certain they had swallowed them whole and soon they would start exhibiting signs of discomfort and basically die on me. The joys of single motherhood! As a last resort I took a flash light and looked under the couch again. And there they were, all of them. Phew! I was sweating like crazy at that point but thankful my babies were ok and I wouldn't have to dish out tons of money for the vet appointment and surgeries etc.

I've said this many times and I even thought I had it in my profile on Facebook in the "about me" sections but I don't.."Cat is not a cat unless it's fat"! I love fat cats. Sox and Bailey were just so cute and cuddly and I love the chubby stomachs of cats. I think it's some kind of disorder I have, genetic mutation or something. I obviously don't want my kittens to get sick so I want them to be regular weight and I also understand that they are growing like crazy right now but is it just me or do they look very skinny? The kitten pamphlets I got with the cats said that kitten is healthy and normal weight when you can feel it's ribs but not see them. That's what BK and DD are. And after their vet appointment a month ago when I put them on a scale they were between 2,2 and 2,6 kg. The scale was off a little so I can't be sure of the exact weights. And I think Brooklyn especially looks really skinny since DD is so fluffy. Every once in awhile I have to flatten DD's fur just to see that she's not actually fat. DD is very much a food nazi and always makes sure she eats enough so sometimes Brooklyn is kicked out of the food bowl. He doesn't want to fight with DD.

As part of my OCSFCD (Obsessive compulsive shopping-for-cats disorder I bought them cat milk. Because really, if kittens between 3 and 6 months old grow many times faster than human babies and human babies main dietary ingredient is milk, which is full of calcium for healthy bone growth...I need to give my kittens milk for calcium for...you get me? And since kittens cannot absorb cow milk they need their own concoction.  I bought Whiskas cat milk because I've given them Whiskas food and it's sexy to stay in-brand. And you know, just to make sure they like the milk and don't get sick by it. With 1,25 euros per 200ml bottle and me not made of money, I opted for cheaper brand. same size but 75 cents per bottle. And even cheaper with Arttu's discounts. Now I either need to give them both their own bowls for the milk or hold DD back while BK is drinking it because DD is crazy about her milk. I think DD has potential to become a fat cat unless she keeps running around like the crazy cat she is. But they're only 5 months old...we've got time!

There was supposed to be some kind of idea for this posting but I think I lost it somewhere along the way...

My lil mama's boy

Brooklyn's way of saying too much computer time, too little cuddling. He's such a mush!